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自力更生 那年我12岁I was 12 years old
序言
记忆，把脸转向月光，让记忆引领你，打开并进入回忆，如果你在那里，会找到幸福的真义，那么，一个新生活，即将开始，记忆，我可对往昔微笑，那时候我很美，我记得过去的幸福时光，让记忆再度鲜活！
——音乐剧【猫】的主题歌词
preface
Memory, turn your face to the moonlight, let the memory lead you, open and enter the memory, if you are there, you will find the true meaning of happiness, then, a new life, will begin, memory, I can **ile to the past, I was very beautiful, I remember the past happy time, let the memory fresh again!
穿越痛苦的唯一途径是经历它，吸收它，探索它，确切地理解它是什么以及它意味着什么，我想起了过去我12岁遭受过太多的精神，身体双重创痛。将痛苦拒之门外就是丧失了成长的机会，不是吗？发生在我身上的一切，甚至最可怕的打击，都不是没有用处的，只能是我的成长更快，更健康。每件事情都会以某种方式进入我的人格结构，正如食物必须进入我的体内一样。
The only way through pain is to experience it, absorb it, explore it, understand exactly what it is and what it means. To shut the door on pain is to lose the opportunity to grow, isn't it? Everything that happened to me, even the most terrible blow, was not useless, but I grew up faster and healthier. Everything enters my personality in some The way, just as food must enter my body.
1 寄养
我被冻醒了，我睁开眼，发现自己睡在集贤巷小学4年级我的课桌上。我倦曲着冰冷的身体，双手紧抱双臂，幻想有个被子能盖一下。
I woke up from the cold. I opened my eyes and found myself sleeping on my desk in grade 4 of jixian lane primary school. I hunched over my cold body, clasped my arms, and fancied a quilt.
西安报话大楼的钟声东方红响后，我数了五下，五点了。我悄悄起床，(是从桌子上起来！)向只有一站路的新城广场走去。
一边走，一边想起昨天，我是寄养在姨妈家的，姨妈是这个学校的数学，音乐老师，姨妈第一次把我赶出家门的情景。她一边用扫把打我，一边哭着骂我，说好的叫你做饭，你竟然不做！你是要饿死我两个儿子呀！滚，别回家！
After the bell of xi 'an telegraph building was ringing in the east, I counted five and it was five o 'clock. I got up quietly and walked to xincheng square which was only one stop away.
As we walked, I remembered yesterday that I was foster in my aunt's house. My aunt was a teacher in this school. My aunt drove me out of the house for the first time. She beat me with a broom, while crying to scold me, said good call you cook, you do not do! You are starving my two sons to death! Get out! Don't go home!
她俩儿子昨天都玩疯了，我说做饭，都说不吃，我也不想吃，便没做。其实，我做的饭还不错，我会擀面，会烧稀饭。可是我没做！是我的错！被姨妈赶出是理所当然。
到了广场，那里人山人海，锻炼的人多是练武术的，刀枪棍棒无奇不有，看到踢腿，看到翻跟头，竟不知这是世界给我说话，我就要去练这些了！
They both had a crazy time yesterday. When I told them to cook, they both said they wouldn't eat. Actually, I can make rice pretty well. I can roll out noodles and cook porridge. But I didn't! It's my fault! Being kicked out by my aunt is a matter of course.
To the square, there is a sea of people, exercise people are practicing martial arts, knives, guns and sticks no surprise, see kick, see somersault, unexpectedly do not know this is the world to me, I will go to practice these!
黄昏，饥肠辘辘的我等到姨夫从长安县一中回来，手抓住自行车，便厚着脸皮回到姨妈家。姨夫在饭后给我们三个理发，用手动的推子，把头发夹在里面钻心的痛。就像老天要惩罚我一样！
Dusk, hungry I wait until uncle come back, the hand grasp bicycle, then thick the skin return to aunt's house. Uncle after dinner to give us three haircuts, with a manual, hair clip in which the pain.
人一生都会犯错，但是，偶尔的犯错要坚决改正，不可以一错再错放纵自己！更不可以犯大的错误，因为小错可以弥补，大错会毁灭一生！
People will make mistakes all their lives. However, we should resolutely correct our occasional mistakes and not indulge ourselves in repeat one's mistakes. Not to make big mistakes, because **all mistakes can make up, big mistakes will destroy life!
什么是小错？记得，小学3年级时，我因为家里从来没有给我买一个玩具，看见同桌有一副扑克牌，就偷拿回家了！同学找到姨妈家，我归还了扑克，得到的是姨妈一顿暴打！
What are **all mistakes ？Remember, primary school grade 3, I never bought me a toy because the home, see a deck of playing CARDS with the table, they stole home! The clas**ate found aunt home, I returned poker, get is aunt beat violently!
从那以后，我自制玩具，正午，坐在教室用纸画象棋盘，左手和右手对抗，想让谁输谁就输！
From then on, I made my own toys， Noon, sitting in the classroom paper draw chess board, left hand and right hand against each other！
什么是大错？
*****时期，我的爸爸有一个好兄弟，不知在那里搞来一只手枪，我爸爸接过来不知枪里有子弹，枪走火了，竟然把好兄弟打死了！被判20年，不仅毁了他自己，我的妈妈被迫改嫁，妹妹送到澄县农民家里，改姓赵。我被抛弃在陕北志丹剧团。妻离子散，家就这样没了！
What is a big mistake?
During the cultural revolution, my father had a good brother who killed him. Sentenced to 20 years, not only destroyed his own, my mother was forced to remarry, sister sent to cheng county farmers home, change the surname zhao. I was abandoned in northern shaanxi zhidan troupe. Separated, so no home!
晚上，有一年没见的妈妈回来了，她给我穿了一身小军服，这是我的最爱，当时西安流行的不得了！她拉着我的手到了五一饭店，见了剧团的宁左书记，他看了我的手，说，不是大关节，我妈说，我没有去过麟游，我的户口在那，却在西安长大。就收下我了。
In the evening, one year did not see the mother came back, she gave me to wear a **all military uniform, this is my favorite, xi 'an was very popular! She took my hand to the May Day hotel, saw the troupe's secretary ning zuo, he looked at my hand, said, not a big joint, my mother said, I have not been to linyou, my household registration in that, but grew up in xi 'an. Just take me.
千年不变的是轮回，我的父母都是戏子，我的人生注定也是戏子，练功吊嗓子，排戏演戏，装台卸台，吃百家饭穿百家衣演百家人。何时能逃脱这千年的轮回？
Millennium is the same is reincarnation, my parents are actors, my life is destined to be actors, practice singing, drama acting, stage unloading stage, eat a hundred family meals wear a hundred family clothes play a hundred people. When can escape this millennium reincarnation?
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