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    HE SAID I WAS BEIN hard on myself Said it was a sign of old age. Tryin to set things  right. I guess theres some truth to that. But it aint the whole truth. I agreed with him  that there wasnt a whole lot good you could say about old age and he said he knew ohing and I said what is that. And he said it dont last long. I waited for him to smile but  he didnt. I said well, thats pretty cold. And he said it was no colder than what the facts  called for. So that was all there was about that. I knew what hed say anyways, bless his  heart. You care about people you try and lighten their load for em. Eves self- ordaihe other thing that was on my mind I never even got around to but I believe  it to be related because I believe that whatever you do in your life it will get back to you.

    If you live long enough it will. And I  think of no reason in the world for that no- good to of killed that girl. What did she ever do to him? The truth is I never should of  gone up there in the first plaow they got that Mexi up here in Huntsville for  killin that state trooper that he shot him a his car afire and him in it and I dont  believe he do. But thats what hes goin to get the death penalty for. So what is my  obligation there? I think I have sort of waited for all of this to go away somehow or  another and of course it aint. I think I khat when it started. It had that feel to it.

    Like I was fixin to get drug into somethihe road back was goin to be a pretty  long one.

    When he asked me why this e up now after so many years I said that it had always  been there. That I had just ig for the most part. But hes right, it did e up. I  think sometimes people would rather have a bad answer about things than no a  all. When I told it, well it took a shape I would not have guessed it to have and in that  way he was right too. It was like a ballplayer told me oime he said that if he had  some slight injury and it bothered him a little bit,  him, he generally played  better. It kept his mind focused ohing instead of a hundred. I  uand that.

    Not that it ges anything.

    I thought if I lived my life irictest way I knew how then I would not ever again  have a thing that would eat ohataway. I said that I was twenty-one years old and I  was entitled to one mistake, particularly if I could learn from it and bee the sort of  man I had it in my mind to be. Well, I was wrong about all of that. Now I aim to quit  and a good part of it is just knowin that I wont be called on to hunt this man. I re  hes a man. So you could say to me that I aint ged a bit and I dont know that I  would even have a argument about that. Thirty-six years. Thats a painful thing to know.

    Oher thing he said. Youd think a man that had waited eighty some odd years on  God to e into his life, well, youd think hed e. If he didnt youd still have to  figure that he knew what he was doin. I dont know what other description of God you  could have. So what you end up with is that those he has spoke to are the ohat must  of  the worst. Thats not a easy thing to accept. Particularly as it might apply to  someone like Loretta. But then maybe we are all of us lookin through the wrong end of  the glass. Always have been.

    Aunt Carolyers to Harold. The reason she had them letters was that he had saved  em. She was the one raised him and she was the same as his mother. Them letters was  dogeared and tore and covered with mud and I dont know what all. The thing about  them letters. Well for ohing you could tell they we></a>re just try people. I dont think  hed ever been out of Irion ty, let alohe State of Texas. But the thing about them  letters was you could tell that the world she lannin on him in back to was not  ever goin to be here. Easy to see now. Sixty some years on. But they just had no notion  at all. You  say you like it or you dont like it but it dont ge nothin. Ive told my  deputies more than ohat you fix what you  fix and you let the rest go. If there  aint nothin to be done about it it aint even a problem. Its just a aggravation. And the  truth is I dont have no more idea of the world that is brewin out there than what Harold  did.

    Of course as it turned out he never e home at all. There was not nothin in them  letters to suggest that she had reed on that possibility.

    Well, you know she did. She just wouldnt of said nothin about it to him.

    Ive still got that medal of course. It e in a fancy purple box with a ribbon and all. It  was in my bureau for years and then one day I took it out and put it in the drawer in the  livin room table where I wouldnt have to look at it. Not that I ever looked at it, but it  was there. Harold did no medal. He just e home in a wooden box. And I dont  believe they had Gold Star mothers in the First World War but if they had of Aunt  Carolyn would not of got one of them either since he was not her natural son. But she  should of. She never got his ensioher.

    So. I went back out there one more time. I walked over that ground and there was very  little sign that anything had ever took place there. I picked up a shell or two. That  was about it. I stood out there a long time and I thought about things. It was one of them  warm days you get in the winter sometimes. A little wind. I still keep thinkin maybe it is  somethin about the try. Sort of the way Ellis said. I thought about my family and  about him out there in his wheelchair in the old house and it just seemed to me that this  try has got a strange kind of history and a damned bloody ooo. About anywhere  you care to look. I could stand back off and smile about such thoughts as them but I still  have em. I dont make excuses for the way I think. Not no more. I talk to my daughter.

    She would be thirty now. Thats all right. I dont care how that sounds. I like talkin to her.

    Call it superstition or whatever you want. I know that over the years I have give her the  heart I always wanted for myself and thats all right. Thats why I listen to her. I know  Ill always get the best from her. It do mixed up with my own ignorany own  meanness. I know how that sounds and I guess Id have to say that I dont care. I never  even told my wife and we dont have a whole lot of secrets from one another. I dont think  shed say Im crazy, but some might. Ed Tom? Yeah, they had to swear out a lunacy  warrant. I hear theyre feedin him uhe door. Thats all right. I listen to what she  says and what she says makes good sense. I wish shed say more of it. I  use all the  help I  get. Well, thats enough of that.

    WHEN HE WALKED IN the house the phone was ringing. Sheriff Bell, he said. He  made his way to the sideboard and picked up the phone. Sheriff Bell, he said.

    Sheriff this is Detective Cook with the Odessa police.

    Yessir.

    Theres a report we have here that is flagged with your  has to do with a woman  named Carla Jean Moss that was murdered here ba March.

    Yessir. I appreciate you callin.

    They picked up the murder on off of the FBI ballistics database and they traced it  down to a boy here in Midland. The boy says he got the gun out of a truck at a act  se. Just seen it and took it. And I expect thats right. I talked to him. He sold it and it  turned up in a venieore robbery in Shreveport Louisiana. Now the act  where he got the gun, it took pla the same day as the murder did. The man that  owhe gu it irud disappeared and he aint been heard from since. So  you  see where this is goin. We do a lot of unsolved homicides up here and we  damn sure dont like em.  I ask you what was your i in the case, Sheriff?

    Bell told him. Cook listehen he gave him a number. It was the iigator of the  act. Roger Catro me call him first. Hell talk to you.

    Thats all right, Bell said. Hell talk to me. Ive known him for years.

    He called the number and Catron answered.

    Howre you do<samp></samp>iom.

    I aint braggin.

    What  I do you for.

    Bell told him about the wreck. Yessir, Catron said. Sure I remember it. There was two  boys killed in that wreck. We still aint found the driver of the other vehicle.

    What happened?

    Boysd been smokin dope. They run a stopsign and hit a brand new Dodge pickup  broadside. Totaled it out. The old boy in the pickup he climbed out and just took off up  the street. Fore we got there. Truck had been bought in Mexico. Illegal. No EPA or  nothin. ration.

    What about the other vehicle.

    There was three boys in it. een, twenty years old. All of em Mexi. The only  one lived was the one in the back seat. Apparently they assin around a doober and  they went through this interse probably about sixty mile a hour and just T-bohe old boy iruck. The one in the passenger side of the car, he e through the  winds head first and crossed the street and landed on a orch. She was  out puttin some mail in her box and he didnt miss her by much. She set off dowreet in her houseer and haircurlers just a hollerin. I dont think shes >藏书网</a>right yet.

    What did you all do with the boy that took the gun?

    We cut him loose.

    If I e up there you re I could talk to him?

    Id say you could. Im lookin at him on the s right now.

    Whats his name?

    David DeMarco.

    Is he Mexi?

    No. The boys in the car was. Not him.

    Will he talk to me?

    One way to find out.

    Ill be there in the mornin.

    I look forward to seein you.

    Catron had called the boy and talked to him and when the boy walked into the cafe he  didnt seem particularly worried about anything. He slid into the booth and propped up  one foot and sucked at his teeth and looked at Bell.

    You want some coffee?

    Yeah. Ill take some coffee.

    Bell raised a finger and the waitress came over and took his order. He looked at the boy.

    What I wao talk to you about was the man that walked away from that wreck. I  wonder if theres anything that es to mind about him. Anything you might  remember.

    The boy shook his head. Naw, he said. He looked around the room.

    How bad was he hurt?

    I dont know. It looked like his arm was broke.

    What else.

    Had a cut on his head. I couldnt say how bad he was hurt. He could walk.

    Bell watched him. How old a man would you say he was?

    Hell, Sheriff. I dont know. He retty bloody and all.

    On the report you said he was maybe in his late thirties.

    Yeah. Somethin like that.

    Who were you with.

    What?

    Who were you with.

    Wasnt with nobody.

    The neighbor there who called in the report, he said there was two of you.

    Well, hes full of it.

    Yeah? I talked to him this mornin and he seemed to me to be about as unfull of it as  they e.

    The waitress brought the coffee. DeMarco poured about a quarter cup of sugar into his  and sat stirring it.

    You know this man had just got done killin a woman two blocks away whe in  that wreck.

    Yeah. I didnt know it at the time.

    You know hoeople hes killed?

    I dont know nothin about him.

    How tall was he would you say?

    Not real tall. Sort of medium.

    Was he wearin boots.

    Yeah. I think he was wearin boots.

    What kind of boots.

    I think they might of been ostrich.

    Expensive boots.

    Yeah.

    How badly was he bleedin?

    I dont know. He was bleedin. He had a cut on his head.

    What did he say?

    He didnt say nothin.

    What did you say to him?

    Nothin. I asked him was he all right.

    You think he might of died?

    I got no idea.

    Bell leaned back. He turhe saltcellar a half turn oabletop. Theur  back again.

    Tell me who you were with.

    Wasnt with nobody.

    Bell studied him. The boy sucked his teeth. He picked up the coffee mug and sipped the  coffee a down again.

    You aint goin to help me, are you?

    I doold you all I know to tell. You seen the report. Thats all I know to tell you.

    Bell sat watg him. The up and put on his hat a.

    In the m he went to the high school and got some names from DeMarcos teacher.

    The first oalked to wao know how hed found him. He was a big kid and he  sat with his hands folded and looked down at his tennis shoes. They were about a size  fourteen and had Left and Right written ooecaps in purple ink.

    Theres somethin you all ai>..t>llin me.

    The boy shook his head.

    Did he threaten you?

    Naw.

    What did he look like? Was he Mexi?

    I dont think so. He was kindly dark plected is all.

    Were you afraid of him?

    I wasnt till you showed up. Hell, Sheriff, I knew we shouldnt of took the damn thing. It  was a dumb-ass thing to do. I aint goin to set here and say it was Davids idea even if it  was. Im big enough to say no.

    Yes you are.

    It was all just weird. Them boys in the car was dead. Am I in trouble over this?

    What else did he say to you.

    The boy looked around the lun. He looked almost in tears. If I had it to do ain Id do it different. I know that.

    What did he say.

    He said that we didnt know what he looked like. He give David a hundred dollar bill.

    A hundred dollars.

    Yeah. David give him his shirt. To make a sling for his arm.

    Bell nodded. All right. What did he look like.

    He was medium height. Medium build. Looked like he was in shape. In his mid thirties  maybe. Dark hair. Dark brown, I think. I dont know, Sheriff. He looked like anybody.

    Like anybody.

    The kid looked at his shoes. He looked up at Bell. He didnt look like anybody. I mean  there wasnt nothin unusual lookin about him. But he didnt look like anybody youd want  to mess with. When he said somethin you damn sure listehere was a boi  out uhe skin on his arm and he didnt pay no more attention to it than nothin.

    All right.

    Am I in trouble over this?

    No.

    I appreciate it.

    You dont know where things will take you, do you?

    No sir, you dont. I think I learned somethin from it. If thats any use to you.

    It is. Do you think DeMarco learned anything?

    The boy shook his head. I dont know, he said. I t speak for David.

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