Part Two-3
百度搜索 The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter 天涯 或 The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter 天涯在线书库 即可找到本书最新章节.
There were many worries on his mind. For ohing, Alice was not well. She worked downstairs as usual from seven in the m until ten at night, but she walked very slowly and brown circles were beh her eyes. It was in the busihat she showed this illness most plainly. One Sunday, when she wrote out the days menu oypewriter, she marked the special dinner with chi a la king at twenty ts instead of fifty, and did not discover the mistake until several ers had already ordered and were ready to pay. Aime she gave back two fives and three ones as ge for ten dollars. Biff would stand looking at her for a long time, rubbing his houghtfully and with his eyes half-closed.They did not speak of this together. At night he worked downstairs while she slept, and during the m she mahe restaurant alone. When they worked together he stayed behind the cash register and looked after the kit and the tables, as was their . They did not talk except on matters of business, but Biff would stand watg her with his face puzzled.
Then iernoon of the eighth of October there was a sudden cry of pain from the room where they slept. Biff hurried upstairs. Within an hour they had taken Alice to the hospital and the doctor had removed from her a tumor almost the size of a newborn child. And then within another hour Alice was dead.
Biff sat by her bed at the hospital in stunned refle. He had bee when she died. Her eyes had been drugged and misty from the ether and then they hardened like glass.
The nurse and the doctor withdrew from the room. He tio look into her face. Except for the bluish pallor there was little difference. He noted each detail about her as though he had watched her every day for twenty-one years.
Then gradually as he sat there his thoughts turo a picture that had long been stored inside him.
The cold green o and a hot gold strip of sand. The little children playing on the edge of the silky line of foam. The
sturdy brown baby girl, the thin little naked boys, the half-grown children running and calling out to each otherwith sweet, shrill voices. Children were here whom he knew, Mid his niece, Baby, and there were alse young fao one had ever seen before. Biff bowed his head.
After a long while he got up from his chair and stood in the middle of the room. He could hear his sister-in-law, Lucile, walking up and down the hall outside. A fat bee crawled across the top of the dresser, and adroitly Biff caught it in his hand and put it out the open window. He gla the dead faore time, and then with widowed sedateness he opehe door mat led out into the hospital corridor.
Late the m he sat sewing in the room upstairs.
Why? Why<q></q> was it that in cases of real love the one who is left does not more often follow the beloved by suicide? Only because the living must bury the dead? Because of the measured rites that must be fulfilled after a death? Because it is as though the one who is left steps for a time upon a stage and each sed swells to an unlimited amount of time and he is watched by many eyes? Because there is a fun he must carry out? Or perhaps, when there is love, the widowed must stay for the resurre of the beloved—so that the one who has gone is not really dead, but grows and is created for a sed time in the soul of the living? Why？
Biff bent close over his sewing aated on many things.
He sewed skillfully, and the calluses oips of his fingers were so hard that he pushed the needle through the cloth without a thimble. Already the m bands had been sewn around the arms of two gray suits, and now he was on the last.
The day was bright and hot, and the first dead leaves of the new autumn scraped on the sidewalks. He had go early.
Each minute was very long. Before him there was infinite leisure. He had locked the door of the restaurant and hung oside a white wreath of lilies. To the funeral home he went first and looked carefully at the sele of caskets. He touched the materials of the linings aed the strength of the frames.
What is the name of the crepe of this one—Geette?’
The uaker answered his questions in an oily,
unctuous voice.
And what is the pertage of cremations in your business?’
Out oreet again Biff walked with measured formality.
From the west there was a warm wind and the sun was very bright. His watch had stopped, so he turned down toward the street where Wilbur Kelly had retly put out his sign as watchmaker. Kelly was sitting at his ben a patched bathrobe. His shop was also a bedroom, and the baby Mick pulled around with her in a wagon sat quietly on a pallet on the floor. Each minute was so long that in it there le time for plation and enquiry. He asked Kelly to explain the exact use of jewels in a watch. He he distorted look of Kellys right eye as it appeared through his watchmakers loupe. They talked for a while about Chamberlain and Munich. Then as the time was still early he decided to go up to the mutes room.
Singer was dressing for work. Last night there had e from him a letter of dolence. He was to be a pallbearer at the funeral. Biff sat on the bed and they smoked a cigarette together. Singer looked at him now and then with his green observant eyes. He offered him a drink of coffee. Biff did not talk, and ohe mute stopped to pat him on the shoulder and look for a sed into his face. When Singer was dressed they went out together.
Biff bought the black ribbon at the store and saw the preacher of Alices church. When all was arranged he came bae.
To put things in order—that was the thought in his mind. He bundled up Alices clothes and personal possessions to give to Lucile. He thhly ed and straightehe bureau drawers. He even rearrahe shelves of the kit downstairs and removed the gaily colored crSpe streamers from the electris. Thehis was do iub and bathed himself all over. And the m was done.
Biff bit the thread and smoothed the black band on the sleeve of his coat. By now Lucile would be waiting for him. He and she and Baby would ride in the funeral car together. He put away the work basket and fitted the coatwith the m band very carefully on his shoulders. He glanced swiftly around the room to see that all was well
befoing out again.
An hour later he was in Luciles kitette. He sat with his legs crossed, a napkin over his thigh, drinking a cup of tea.
Lucile and Alice had been so different in all ways that it was not easy to realize they were sisters. Lucile was thin and dark, and today she had dressed pletely in black. She was fixing Babys hair. The kid waited patiently o table with her hands folded in her lap while her mother worked on her.
The sunlight was quiet and mellow in the room.
Bartholomew------ said Lucile.
?What?’
"Dont you ever start thinking backward?’
I dont,said Biff.
You know its like I got to wear blinders all the time so I wont think sideways or in the past. All I let myself think about is going to work every day and fixing meals and Babys future.’
Thats the right attitude.’
I been giving Baby finger waves down at the shop. But they e out so quick I been thinking about letting her have a perma. I dont want to give it to her myself— I think maybe take her up to Atlanta when I go to the etologist vention a her get it there.’
Mod! Shes not b９9ｌｉb? four. Its liable to scare her. And besides, permas tend to coarsen the hair.’
Lucile dipped the b in a glass of water and mashed the curls over Babys ears. No, they dont. And she wants one.
Young as Baby is, she already has as much ambition as I got.
And thats saying plenty.’
Biff polished his nails on the palm of his hand and shook his head.
Every time Baby and I go to the movies ahose kids in all the good roles she feels the same way I do. I swear she does, Bartholomew. I t eve her to eat her supper afterward.’
Foodness sake, Biff said.
Shes getting along so fih her dang and expression lessons. year I wao start with the piano because I think itll be a help for her to play some.
Her dang teacher is going to give her a solo in the
soiree. I feel like I got to push Baby all I . Because the sooner she gets started on her career the better itll be for both of us.’
Mod!’
You dont uand. A child with talent t be treated like ordinary kids. Thats one reason I want to get Baby out of this on neighborhood. I t let her start to talk vulgar like these brats around her or run wild like they do.’
I know the kids on this block, Biff said. Theyre all right.
Those Kelly kids across the street—the e boy------？
You know good ahat none of them are up toBabys level.’
Lucile set the last wave in Babys hair. She pihe kids little cheeks to put more color ihen she lifted her down from the table. For the funeral Baby had on a little white dress with white shoes and white socks and even small white gloves. There was a certain way Baby always held her head when people looked at her, and it was turhat way now.
They sat for a while in the small, hot kitette without saying anything. Then Lucile began to cry. Its not like we was ever very close as sisters. We had our differences and we didnt see much of each other. Maybe it was because I was so much younger. But theres something about your own blood kin, and when anything like this happens------’
Biff clucked soothingly.
I know how you two were, she said. It wasnt all just roses with you and she. But maybe that sort of makes it worse for you now.’
Biff caught Baby uhe arms and swung her up to his shoulder. The kid was getting heavier. He held her carefully as he stepped into the living-room. Baby felt warm and close on his shoulder, and her little silk skirt was white against the dark cloth of his coat. She grasped one of his ears very tight with her little hand.
Unca Biff! Watch me do the split.’
Gently he set Baby on her feet again. She curved both arms above her head and her feet slid slowly in oppositedires on the yellow waxed floor. In a moment she was seated with oretched straight in front of her and one
behind. She posed with her arms held at a fangle, looking sideways at the wall with a sad expression.
She scrambled up again. Watch me do a handspring. Watch me do a------’
Honey, be a little quieter, Lucile said. She sat down beside Biff on the plush sofa. Dont she remind you a little of him—something about her eyes and face?’
Hell, no. I t see the slightest resemblaween Baby and Leroy Wilson.’
Lucile looked too thin and worn out for her age. Maybe it was the black dress and because she had been g. After all, we got to admit hes Babys father, she said.
t you ever fet about that man?’
I dont know. I guess I always been a fool about two things.
And thats Leroy and Baby.’
Bills new growth of beard was blue against the pale skin of his fad his voice souired. Dont you ever just think a thing through and find out whats happened and what ought to e from that? Dont you ever use logi<—if these are the given facts this ought to be the result?’
Not about him, I guess.’
Biff spoke in a weary manner and his eyes were almost closed.
You married this certain party when you were seventeen, and afterward there was just one racket between you after another.
You divorced him. Then two years later you married him a sed time. And now hes gone off again and you dont know where he is. It seems like those facts would show you ohing—you two are not suited to each other. And thats aside from the more personal side—the sort of man this certain party happens to be anyway.’
God knows I been realizing all along hes a heel. I just hope he wont ever kno that dain.’
Look, Baby, Biff said quickly. He laced his fingers and held up his hands. "This is the churd this is the steeple. Open the door and here are Gods people.’
Lucile shook her head. You dont have to bother about Baby. I tell her everything. She knows about the whole mess from A to Z.’
"Then if he es back youll let him stay here and sponge on you just as long as he pleases—like it was before?’
Yeah. I guess I would. Every time the doorbell or the phs, every time anybody steps up on the porch, something in the bay mind thinks about that man. Biff spread out the palms of his hands. There you are. The clock struck two.
The room was very close and hot. Baby turned another handspring and made a split again on the waxed floor. Then Biff took her up into his lap. Her little legs dangled against his shin. She unbuttoned his vest and burrowed her fato him.
Listen, Lucile said. If I ask you a question will you promise to answer me the truth? Sure.’
No matter what it is?’
Biff touched Babys soft gold hair and laid his haly on the side of her little head. Of course.’
It was about seven years ago. Soon after we was married the first time. And he came in one night from your place with big knots all over his head and told me you caught him by the ned banged his head against the side of the wall. He made up some tale about why you did it, but I want to know the real reason.’
Biff turhe wedding ring on his finger. I just never did like Leroy, and we had a fight In those days I was different from now.’
"No. There was some defihing you did that for. We been knowing each other a pretty long time, and I uand by now that you got a real reason for every sihing you ever do. Your mind runs by reasons instead of just wants. Now, you promised youd tell me what it was, and I want to know.’
It wouldnt mean anything now/ I tell you I got to know.’
All right, Biff said. He came in that night and started drinking, and when he was drunk he shot off his mouth about you. He said he would e home about once a month a hell out of you and you would take it. But then afterward you would step outside in the hall and laugh aloud a few times so that the neighbors iher rooms would think you both had just been playing around and it had all been a joke. Thats what happened, so just fet about it’
Lucile sat up straight and there was a red spot on each of her cheeks. You see, Bartholomew, thats why I got to be like I have blinders on all the time so as not to think backward or sideways. All I let my mind stay on is going to work every day and fixing three meals here at home and Babys career.’
Yes.’
I hope youll do that too, and not start thinking backward.’
Biff leaned his head down on his chest and closed his eyes.
During the whole long day he had not been able to think of Alice. Wheried to remember her face there was a queer blankness in him. The only thing about her that was clear in his mind was her feet—stumpy, very soft and white with puffy toes. The bottoms were pink ahe left heel there was a tiny brown mole. The night they were married he had taken off her shoes and stogs and kissed her feet. And, e to think of it, that was worth siderable, because the Japanese believe that the choicest part of a woman------Biff stirred and gla his watch. In a little while they would leave for the church where the funeral would be held.
In his mind he went through the motions of the ceremony. The church—riding, dirge-paced behind the hearse with Lucile and Baby—the group of people stand- ing with bowed heads in the September sunshine. Sun on ? the white tombstones, on the fading flowers and the - vas tent c the newly dug grave. Then home again —and what？
No matter how much you quarrel theres something about your own blood sister, Lucile said.
Biff raised his head. Why dont you marry again? Some nice young man whos never had a wife before, who would take care of you and Baby? If youd just fet about Leroy you would make a good man a fine wife.’
Lucile was slow to ahen finally she said: *You knoe always been—we nearly all the time uand each other pretty well without any kind of throbs either way. Well, thats the closest I ever want to be to any man again.’
feel the same way, Biff said.
Half an hour later there was a kno the door. The car for the funeral arked before the house. Biff and Lucile got up slowly. The three of them, with Baby in her white silk
dress a little ahead, walked in solemn quietness outside.
Biff kept the restaurant closed during the day. Then in the early evening he removed the faded wreath of lilies from the front door and opehe place for business again. Old ers came in with sad faces and talked with him a few minutes by the cash register befiving their orders. The usual croresent—Singer, Blount, various men who worked in stores along the blod in the mills down on the river. After supper Mick Kelly showed up with her little brother and put a nickel into the slot mae. When she lost the first she banged on the mae with her fists a opening the receiver to be sure that nothing had e down. The in another nickel and almost won the jackpot. s came clattering out and rolled along the floor.
The kid and her little brother both kept looking around pretty sharp as they picked them up, so that no er would put his foot on one before they could get to it The mute was at the table in the middle of the room with his dinner before him.
Across from him Jake Blount sat drinking beer, dressed in his Sunday clothes, and talking. Everything was the same as it had always been before. After a while the air became gray with cigarette smoke and the noise increased. Biff was alert, and no sound or movement escaped him.
I go around, Blount said. He leaned early across the table a his eyes oes face. I go all around and try to tell them. And they laugh. I t make them uand anything. No matter what I say I t seem to make them see, the truth.’
Singer nodded and wiped his mouth with his napkin. His dinner had got cold because he couldnt look down to eat, but he was so polite that he let Blount go on talking. The words of the two children at the slot mae were high and clear against the coarser voices of the men. Mick utting her nickels bato the slot. Often she looked around at the middle table, but the mute had his back turo her and did not see.Mister Singers got fried chi for his supper and he hasen one piece yet, the little boy said.
Mick pulled down the lever of the mae very slowly. Mind
your own business.’
Youre always going up to his room or some place where you know hell be.’
I told you to hush, Bubber Kelly.’
You do.’
Mick shook him until his teeth rattled and turned him around toward the door. You go on home to bed. I already told you I get a bellyful of you and Ralph in the daytime, and I dont want you hanging arou night when Im supposed to be free.’
Bubber held out bis grimy little hand. Well, give me a hen. When he had put the money in his shirt pocket he left for home.
Biff straightened his coat and smoothed back his hair. His tie was solid black, and on the sleeve of his gray coat there was the m band that he had sewn there. He wao go up to the slot mae and talk with Mick, but something would not let him. He sucked in his breath sharply and drank a glass of water. A dance orchestra came in on the radio, but he did not want to listen. All the tunes in the last ten years were so alike he couldnt tell one from the other. Since he had not enjoyed music. Yet when he was young he used to play the mandolin, and he khe words and the melody of every current song.
He laid his finger on the side of his nose and cocked his head to one side. Mick had grown so mu the past year that soon she would be taller than he was. She was dressed in the red sweater and blue pleated skirt she had worn every day since school started. Now the pleats had e out and the hem dragged loose around her sharp, jutting knees. She was at the age when she looked as much like an rown boy as a girl.
And on that subject why was it that the smartest people mostly missed that point? By nature all people are of both sexes. So that marriage and the bed is not all by any means. The proof? Real youth and old age. Because often old mens voices grow high and reedy and they take on a ming walk. And old women sometimes grow fat and their voices get rough and deep and they grow dark little mustaches. And he even proved it himself—the part of him that sometimes almost wished he was a mother and that Mid Baby were his kids.
Abruptly Biff turned from the cash register.
The neers were in a mess. For two weeks he hadnt filed a single one. He lifted a stack of them from uhe ter.
With a practiced eye he glanced from the masthead to the bottom of the sheet. Tomorrow he would look over the stacks of them in the ba and see about ging the system of files. Build shelves and use those solid boxes ed goods were shipped in for drawers. ologically from October ,, on up to the present date. With folders and top markings outlining historical events. Three sets of outlines—oernational beginning with the Armistid leading through the Munich aftermath, the sed national, the third all the local dope from the time Mayor Lester shot his wife at the try club up to the Hudson Mill fire. Everything for the past twenty years docketed and outlined and plete. Biff beamed quietly behind his hand as he rubbed his jaw. A Alice had wanted him to haul out the papers so she could turn the room into a ladies toilet. That was just what she had nagged him to do, but for once he had battered her down. For that oime.
With peaceful absorption Biff settled down to the details of the neer before him. He read steadily and with tration, but from habit some sedary part of him was alert to everything around him. Jake Blount was still talking, and often he would hit his fist oable. The mute sipped beer. Mick walked restlessly around the radio and stared at the ers. Biff read every word in the first paper and made a few notes on themargins.
Then suddenly he looked up with a surprised expression. His mouth had been open for a yawn and he s shut. The radio swung into an old song that dated back to the time when he and Alice were engaged. Just a Babys Prayer at Twilight. They had takereetcar one Sunday to Old Sardis Lake and had rented a rowboat. At su he played on the mandolin while she sang. She had on a sailor hat, and whe his arm around her waistshe—Alice-------A drag for lost feelings. Biff folded the neersand put them bader the ter. He stood on one foot
and theher. Finally he called across the room to Mick.
Youre not listening, are you?’
Mick turned off the radio. No. Nothing on tonight. All of that he would keep out of his mind, and trate on something else. He leaned over the ter and watched one er after ahen at last his attentioed oe at the middle table. He saw Mick edge gradually up to him and at his invitation sit down. Singer poio something on the menu and the waitress brought a Coca-Cola for her. Nobody but a freak like a deaf-mute, cut off from other people, would ask a right young girl to sit down to the table where he was drinking with another man. Blount and Mick both kept their eyes on Sihey talked, and the mutes expression ged as he watched them. It was a funny thing. The reason—was it in them or in him? He sat very still with his hands in his pockets, and because he did not speak it made him seem superior. What did that fellow think and realize? What did he know？
Twice during the evening Biff started to go over to the middle table, but each time he checked himself. After they were goill wondered what it was about this mute —and in the early dawn when he lay in bed he turned over questions and solutions in his mind without satisfa. The puzzle had taken root in him. It worried him in the back of his mind a him uneasy. There was something wrong.
[.ANY times Doctor Copeland talked to Mr. Siruly he was not like other white men. He was a wise man, and he uood the strong, true purpose in a way that other white men could not. He listened, and in his face there was somethile and Jewish, the knowledge of one who belongs to a race that is oppressed. On one occasioook Mr. Singer with him on his rounds. He led him through cold and narrow passages smelling of dirt and siess and fried fatback. He showed him a successful skin graft made on the face of a atient who had been severely burned. He treated a syphilitic child and pointed out to Mr. Sihe sg eruption on the palms of the hand, the dull, opaque surface of the eye, the sloping upper front incisors. They visited two-room shacks that housed as
many as twelve or fourteen persons. In a room where the fire burned low and e on the hearth they were helpless while an old man strangled with pneumonia. Mr. Singer walked behind him and watched and uood. He gave o the children, and because of his quietness and de he did not disturb the patients as would have another visitor.
The days were chilly and treacherous. Iown there was an outbreak of influenza so that Dr. Copeland was busy most of the hours of the day and night. He drove through the Negro ses of the town in the high Dodge automobile he had used for the past nine years. He kept the isinglass curtains so the windows to cut off the draughts, and tight around his neck he wore his gray wool shawl. During this time he did not see Portia or William hboy, but oftehought of them. Once when he was aortia came to see him a a note and borrowed half a sack<dfn></dfn> of meal.
There came a night when he was so exhausted that, although there were other calls to make, he drank hot milk ao bed. He was cold and feverish so that at first he could not rest.
Then it seemed that he had only begun to sleep when a voice called him. He got up wearily and, still in his long flannel nightshirt, he opehe front door. It ortia.
"The Lord Jesus help us, Father, she said. Doctor Copeland stood shivering with his nightshirt drawn close around his waist. He held his hand to his throat and looked at her and waited.
百度搜索 The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter 天涯 或 The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter 天涯在线书库 即可找到本书最新章节.