Chapter 9
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To say that the play was a smashing success was to put it mildly. The audience laughed and the audience cried, which is pretty much what they were supposed to do. But because of Jamies prese really became something special-and I think everyone in the cast was as shocked as I was at how well the whole thing had e off. They all had that same look I did when I first saw her, and it made the play that much more powerful when they were perf their parts. We fihe first performahout a hitch, and the evening even more people showed up, if you believe it. Even Eric came up to me afterward and gratulated me, which after what hed said to me before was somewhat of a surprise."The two of you did good," he said simply. "Im proud of you, buddy.”
While he said it, Miss Garber was g out, "Marvelous!" to anyone who would listen to her or who just happeo be walking past, repeating it over and over so much that I kept on hearing it long after I went to bed that night. I looked for Jamie after wed pulled the curtains closed for the final time, and spotted her off to the side, with her father. He had tears in his eyes-it was the first time Id ever seen him cry-and Jamie went into his arms, and they held each other for a long time. He was stroking her hair and whispering, "My angel," to her while her eyes were closed, and even I felt myself choking up.
The &quht thing," I realized, wasnt so bad after all.
After they finally let go of each other, Hegbert proudly motioned for her to visit with the rest of the cast, and she got a boatload of gratulations from everyone backstage. She knew shed done well, though she kept on telling people she didnt know what all the fuss was about. She was her normal cheerful self, but with her looking so pretty, it came across in a totally different way. I stood in the background, letting her have her moment, and Ill admit there art of me that felt like old Hegbert. I couldnt help but be happy for her, and a little proud as well. When she finally saw me standing off to one side, she excused herself from the others and walked over, finally stopping when she was close.
Looking up at me, she smiled. "Thank you, Landon, for what you did. You made my father very happy.”
"Youre wele," I said, meaning it.
The strahing was, when she said it, I realized that Hegbert would be driving her home, and for once I wished that I would have had the opportunity to walk her there.
The following Monday was our last week of schbbr></abbr>ool before Christmas break, and finals were scheduled in every class. In addition, I had to finish my application for UNC, which Id sort of been putting off because of all the rehearsals. I planned on hitting the books pretty hard that week, then doing the application at night before I went to bed. Even so, I couldnt help but think about Jamie.
Jamies transformation during the play had been startling, to say the least, and I assumed it had signaled a ge in her. I dont know why I thought that way, but I did, and so I was amazed when she showed up our first m back dressed like her usual self: brower, hair in a bun, plaid skirt, and all.
One look was all it took, and I couldnt help but feel sorry for her. Shed been regarded as normal-even special-over the weekend, or so it had seemed, but shed somehow let it slip away. Oh, people were a little o her, and the ones who hadnt talked to her yet told her what a good job shed dooo, but I could tell right off that it wasnt going to last. Attitudes fed since childhood are hard to break, and part of me wondered if it might eve worse for her after this. Noeople actually knew she could look normal, they might even beore heartless.
I wao talk to her about my impressions, I really did, but I lanning to do so after the week was over. Not only did I have a lot to do, but I wanted a little time to think of the best way to tell her. To be ho, I was still feeling a little guilty about the things Id said to her on our last walk home, and it wasnt just because the play had turned out great. It had more to do with the fact that in all our time together, Jamie had never once been anything but kind, and I khat Id been wrong.
I didnt think she wao talk to me, either, to tell you the truth. I knew she could see me hanging out with my friends at lunch while she sat off in the er, reading her Bible, but she never made a move toward us. But as I was leaving school that day, I heard her voice behind me, asking me if I wouldnt mind walking her home. Even though I wasnt ready to tell her yet about my thoughts, I agreed. For old times sake, you see.
A mier Jamie got down to business.
"Do you remember those things you said on our last walk home?" she asked.
I nodded, wishing she hadnt brought it up.
"You promised to make it up to me," she said.
For a moment I was fused. I thought Id dohat already with my performan the play. Jamie went on.
"Well, Ive been thinking about <tt></tt>what you could do," she tinued without letti a word in edgewise, "and this is what Ive e up with.”
She asked if I wouldnt mind gathering the pickle jars and coffee s shed set out in businesses all over town early in the year. They sat on the ters, usually he cash registers, so that people could drop their loose ge in. The money was to go to the orphans. Jamie never wao ask people straight out for the money, she wahem to give voluntarily. That, in her mind, was the Christian thing to do.
I remembered seeing the tainers in places like Cecils Diner and the Theater. My friends and I used to toss paper clips and slugs in there when the cashiers werent looking, sihey sounded sort of like a being dropped ihen wed chuckle to ourselves about hoere putting something over on Jamie. We used to joke about how shed open one of her s, expeg something good because of the weight, and shed dump it out and find nothing but slugs and paper clips. Sometimes, when you remember the things you used to do, it makes you wince, and thats exactly what I did.
Jamie saw the look on my face.
"You dont have to do it," she said, obviously disappointed. "I was just thinking that since Christmas is ing up so quickly and I dont have a car, itll simply take me too long to collect them all. . . .”
"No," I said cutting her off, "Ill do it. I dont have much to do anyway.”
So thats what I did starting Wednesday, even though I had tests to study for, even with that application needing to be finished. Jamie had given me a list of every place shed placed a , and I borrowed my moms car and started at the far end of town the following day. Shed put out about sixty s in all, and I figured that it would take only a day to collect them all. pared to putting them out, it would be a piece of cake. It had taken Jamie almost six weeks to do because shed first had to find sixty empty jars and s and then she could put out only two or three a day since she didnt have a car and could carry only so many at a time. When I started out, I felt sort of funny about being the one who picked up the s and jars, being that it was Jamies project, but I kept telling myself that Jamie had asked me to help.
I went from busio business, colleg the s and jars, and by end of the first day I realized it was going to take a little lohan Id thought.
Id picked up only about twenty tainers or so, because Id fotten one simple fact of life in Beaufort. In a small town like this, it was impossible to simply run inside and grab the without chatting with the proprietor or saying hello to someone else you might reize. It just wasnt done. So Id sit there while some guy would be talking about the marlin hed hooked last fall, or theyd ask me how school was going aion that they needed a hand unloading a few boxes in the baaybe they wanted my opinion oher they should move the magazine rack over to the other side of the store. Jamie, I knew, would have been good at this, and I tried to act like I thought she would wao. It was her project after all.
To keep things moving, I didnt stop to check the take iween the businesses. I just dumped one jar or into the , bining them as I went along. By the end of the first day all the ge acked in twe jars, and I carried them up to my room. I saw a few bills through the glass-not too many-but I wasnt actually nervous until I emptied the tents onto my floor and saw that the ge sisted primarily of pehough there werent nearly as many slugs or paper clips as Id thought there might be, I was still disheartened when I ted up the mohere was $20.32. Even in 1958 that wasnt a lot of money, especially when divided among thirty kids.
I did disced, though. Thinking that it was a mistake, I went out the day, hauled a few dozen boxes, and chatted with awenty proprietors while I collected s and jars. The take: $23.89.
The third day was even worse. After ting up the money, even I couldnt believe it. There was only $11.52. Those were from the businesses down by the waterfront, where the tourists and teenagers like me hung out. We were really something, I couldnt help but think.
Seeing how little had been collected in all-$55.73-made me feel awful, especially sidering that the jars had been out for almost a whole year and that I myself had seen them tless times. That night I was supposed to call Jamie to tell her the amount Id collected, but I just couldnt do it. Shed told me how shed wanted somethira special this year, and this wasnt going to do it-even I khat. Instead I lied to her and told her that I wasnt going to t the total until the two of us could do it together, because it was her projeot mi was just too depressing. I promised t over the mohe following afternoon, after school let out. The day was December 21, the shortest day of the year. Christmas was only four days away.
"Landon," she said to me after ting it up, "this is a miracle!”
"How much is there?" I asked. I kly how much it was.
"Theres almost two hundred and forty-seven dollars here!" She was absolutely joyous as she looked up at me. Since Hegbert was home, I was allowed to sit in the living room, and thats where Jamie had ted the money. It was stacked i little piles all over the floor, almost all quarters and dimes. Hegbert was i at the table, writing his sermon, and eveurned his head when he heard the sound of her voice.
"Do you think thats enough?" I asked ily.
Little tears were ing down her cheeks as she looked around the room, still not believing what she was seeing right in front of her. Even after the play, she hadnt been nearly this happy. She looked right at me.
"Its . . . wonderful," she said, smiling. There was more emotion than Id ever heard in her voice before. "Last year, I only collected seventy dollars.”
"Im glad it worked out better this year," I said through the lump that had formed in my throat. "If you hadnt placed those jars out so early in the year, you might not have collected nearly as much.”
I know I was lying, but I didnt care. For o was the right thing to do.
I didnt help Jamie pick out the toys-I figured shed know better what the kids would want anyway-but shed insisted that I go with her to the orphanage on Christmas Eve so that I could be there when the children opeheir gifts.
"Please, Landon," shed said, and with her being so excited and all, I just didnt have the heart to turn her down.
So three days later, while my father and mother were at a party at the mayors house, I dressed in a houndstooth jacket and my best tie and walked to my moms car with Jamies preseh my arm. Id spent my last few dollars on a nice sweater because that was all I could think to get her. She wasly the easiest person to shop for.
I was supposed to be at the orpha seven, but the bridge he Morehead City port, and I had to wait until an outbound freighter slowly made its way down the el. As a result, I arrived a few minutes late. The front door was already locked by that time, and <samp></samp>I had to pound on it until Mr. Jenkins finally heard me. He fiddled through his set of keys until he found the right one, and a moment later he opehe door. I stepped inside, patting my arms to ward off the chill.
"Ah . . . youre here," he said happily. "Weve been waiting for you. , Ill take you to where everyone is.”
He led me down the hall to the re, the same place Id been before. I paused for just a moment to exhale deeply before finally heading in.
It was eveer than Id imagined.
In the ter of the room I saw a giant tree, decorated with tinsel and colored lights and a hundred different handmade ors. Beh the tree, spread in all dires, were ed gifts of every size and shape. They were piled high, and the children were on the floor, sitting close together in a large semicircle. They were dressed in their best clothes, I assumed-the boys wore navy blue slacks and white collared shirts, while the girls had on navy skirts and long-sleeved blouses. They all looked as if theyd ed up before the big event, and most of the boys had had their hair cut.
Oable beside the door, there was a bowl of pund platters of cookies, shaped like Christmas trees and sprinkled with green sugar. I could see some adults sitting with the children; a few of the smaller kids were sitting on the adults laps, their faces rapt with attention as they listeo " Twas the Night Before Christmas.”
I didnt see Jamie, though, at least nht off the bat. It was her voice that I reized first. She was the one reading the story, and I finally located her. She was sitting on the floor in front of the tree with her legs beh her.
To my surprise, I saw that tonight her hair hung loosely, just as it had the night of the play. Instead of the old brown cardigan Id seen so many times, she was wearing a red V-neck sweater that somehow atuated the color of her light blue eyes. Even without sparkles in her hair or a long white flowing dress, the sight of her was arresting. Without even notig it, Id been holding my breath, and I could see Mr. Jenkins smiling at me out of the er of my eye. I exhaled and smiled, trying tain trol.
Jamie paused only oo look up from the story. She noticed me standing in the doorway, the back to reading to the children. It took her another minute or so to finish, and when she did, she stood up and smoothed her skirt, then walked around the children to make her way toward me. Not knowing where she wanted me to go, I stayed where I was.
By then Mr. Jenkins had slipped away.
"Im sorry we started without you," she said when she finally reached me, "but the kids were just so excited.”
"Its okay," I said, smiling, thinking how nice she looked.
"Im so glad you could e.”
"So am I.”
Jamie smiled and reached for my hand to lead the way. " with me," she said.
"Help me hand out the gifts.”
We spent the hour doing just that, ached as the children opehem one by one. Jamie had shopped all over town, pig up a few things for each child in the room, individual gifts that theyd never received before. The gifts that Jamie bought werent the only ohe children received, however-both the orphanage and the people who worked there had bought some things as well. As paper was tossed around the room ied frenzy, there were squeals of delight everywhere. To me, at least, it seemed that all of the children had received far more than theyd expected, and they kept thanking Jamie over and over.
By the time the dust had finally settled and all the childrens gifts were opehe atmosphere began to calm down. The room was<samp></samp> tidied up by Mr. Jenkins and a woman Id never met, and some of the smaller children were beginning to fall asleep beh the tree. Some of the older ones had already gone back to their rooms with their gifts, and theyd dimmed the overhead lights on the way out the door. The tree lights cast ahereal glow as "Silent Night" played softly on a phonograph that had bee up in the er. I was still sitting on the floor o Jamie, who was holding a young girl whod fallen asleep in her lap. Because of all the otion, we hadnt really had a ce to talk, not that either of us had minded. We were both gazing up at the lights oree, and I wondered what Jamie was thinking. If truth be told, I didnt know, but she had a tender look about her. I thought-no,I knew -she leased with how the evening had gone, and deep down, so was I. To this point it was the best Christmas Eve Id ever spent.
I gla her. With the lights glowing on her face, she looked as pretty as anyone Id ever seen.
"I bought you something," I finally said to her. "A gift, I mean." I spoke softly so I wouldnt wake the little girl, and I hoped it would hide the nervousness in my voice.
She turned from the tree to face me, smiling softly. "You didnt have to do that." She kept her voice low, too, and it sounded almost musical.
"I know," I said. "But I wao." Id kept the gift off to one side, and I reached for it, handing the gift-ed package to her.
"Could you open it for me? My hands are kind of full right now." She looked down at the little girl, then bae.
"You dont have to open it now, if youd rather not," I said, shrugging, "its really not that big of a deal.”
"Dont be silly," she said. "I would only open it in front of you.”
To clear my mind, I looked at the gift and started opening it, pig at the tape so that it wouldnt make muoise, then uning the paper until I reached the box. After setting the paper off to the side, I lifted the cover and pulled out the sweater, holding it up to show her. It was brown, like the ones she usually wore. But I figured she could use a new one.
pared with the joy Id seen earlier, I didnt expect much of a rea.
"See, thats all. I told you it wasnt much," I said. I hoped she wasnt disappointed in it.
"Its beautiful, Landon," she said early. "Ill wear it the ime I see you. Thank you.”
We sat quietly for a moment, and once again I began to look at the lights.
"I brought you something, too," Jamie finally whispered. She looked toward the tree, and my eyes followed her gaze. Her gift was still beh the tree, partially hidden by the stand, and I reached for it. It was regular, flexible, and a little heavy. I brought it to my lap and held it there without even trying to open it.
"Open it," she said, looking right at me.
"You t give this to me," I said breathlessly. I already knew what was inside, and I couldnt believe what she had done. My hands began to tremble.
"Please," she said to me with the ki voice Id ever heard, "open it. I want you to have it.”
Relutly I slowly uned the package. When it was finally free of the paper, I held it gently, afraid to damage it. I stared at it, mesmerized, and slowly ran my hand over the top, brushing my fingers over the well-worher as tears filled my eyes. Jamie reached out aed her hand on mi was warm and soft.
I gla her, not knowing what to say.
Jamie had given me her Bible.
"Thank you for doing what you did," she whispered to me. "It was the best Christmas Ive ever had.”
I turned away without responding and reached off to the side where Id set my glass of punch. The chorus of "Silent Night" was still playing, and the music filled the room. I took a sip of the punch, trying to soothe the sudden dryness in my throat. As I drank, all the times Id spent with Jamie came flooding into my mind. I thought about the homeing dand what shed done for me that night. I thought about the play and how angelic shed looked. I thought about the times Id walked her home and how Id helped collect jars and s filled with pennies for the orphans.
As these images were going through my head, my breathing suddenly went still. I looked at Jamie, then up to the ceiling and around the room, doing my best to keep my posure, then baie again. She smiled at me and I smiled at her and all I could do was wonder how Id ever fallen in love with a girl like Jamie Sullivan.
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