The Balloon
Unspeakable Practices, Unnatural Acts 作者：唐纳德·巴塞尔姆 投票推荐 加入书签 留言反馈
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The balloon, beginning at a point on Fourteenth Street, the exact location of which I ot reveal, expanded northward all one night, while people were sleeping, until it reached the Park. There, I stopped it; at dawn the northernmost edges lay over the Plaza; the free-hanging motion was frivo?lous ale. But experieng a faint irritation at stopping, even to protect the trees, and seeing no reason the balloon should not be allowed to expand upward, over the parts of the city it was already c, into the "air space" to be found there, I asked the engio see to it. This expan?sion took place throughout the m, soft imperceptible sighing of gas through the valves. The balloon then covered forty-five bloorth-south and an irregular area east-west, as many as six crosstown blocks oher side of the Avenue in some places. That was the situation, then.But it is wrong to speak of "situations," implyis of circumstances leading to some resolution, some escape of tension; there were no situations, simply the balloon hanging there -- muted heavy grays and browns for the most part, trasting with walnut and soft yellows. A deliberate lack of finish, enhanced by skillful installation, gave the surface a rough, fotten quality; slidis on the inside, carefully adjusted, anchored the great, vari-shaped mass at a number of points. Now we have had a flood inal ideas in all media, works of singular beauty as well as signifit mile?stones in the history of inflation, but at that moment there was only this balloon, crete particular, hanging there.
There were reas. Some people found the balloon "iing." As a respohis seemed ie to the immensity of the balloon, the suddenness of its appearance over the city; oher hand, in the absence of hysteria or other societally-induced ay, it must be judged a calm, "mature" ohere was a certain amount of initial argumentation about the "meaning" of the balloon; this subsided, because we have learned not to insist on meanings, and they are rarely even looked for now, except in cases involving the simplest, safest phenomena. It was agreed that sihe meaning of the balloon could never be known absolutely, extended discussion ointless, or at least less purposeful thaivities of those who, for ex?ample, hung green and blue paper lanterns from the warm gray underside, iain streets, or seized the occasion to write messages on the sur?face, announg their availability for the perfor?mance of unnatural acts, or the availability of acquaintances.
Daring children jumped, especially at those points where the balloon hovered close to a build?ing, so that the gap between balloon and building was a matter of a few inches, or points where the balloon actually made tact, exerting an ever-so-slight pressure against the side of a building, so that balloon and building seemed a unity. The upper surface was so structured that a "landscape" resented, small valleys as well as slight knolls, or mounds; oop the balloon, a stroll os?sible, or even a trip, from one place to ahere leasure in being able to run down an ine, then up the opposing slope, both gently graded, or in making a leap from one side to the other. Boung ossible, because of the picity of thebbr></abbr> surface, and even falling, if that was your wish. That all these varied motions, as well as others, were within ones possibilities, in experieng the "up" side of the balloon, was extremely exg for children, aced to the citys flat, hard skin. But the purpose of the balloon was not to amuse children.
Too, the number of people, children and adults, who took advantage of the opportunities described was not se as it might have been: a certain timidity, lack of trust in the balloon, was seen. There was, furthermore, some hostility. Because we had hidden the pumps, which fed helium to the interior, and because the surface was so vast that the authorities could not determihe point of entry -- that is, the point at which the gas was ied -- a degree of frustration was evidenced by those city officers into whose province such maions normally fell. The apparent purposelessness of the balloon was vexing (as was the fact that it was "there" at all). Had we painted, i letters, "LABORATORY TESTS PROVE" or "18% MORE EFFECTIVE" on the sides of the balloon, this diffi?culty would have been circumvented. But I could not bear to do so. On the whole, these officers were remarkably tolerant, sidering the dimensions of th藏书网e anomaly, this tolerance being the result of, first, secret tests ducted by night that vihem that little or nothing could be done in the way of removing or destroying the balloon, and, sedly, a public warmth that arose (not uncolored by touches of the aforementioned hostility) toward the balloon, from ordinary citizens.
As a single balloon must stand for a lifetime of thinking about balloons, so each citizen expressed, iitude he chose, a plex of attitudes. One man might sider that the balloon had to do with the notion sullied, as in the sentehe big balloon sullied the otherwise clear and radiant Manhattan sky. That is, the balloon was, in this mans view, an imposture, something inferior to the sky that had formerly been there, something inter?posed between the people and their "sky." But in fact it was January, the sky was dark and ugly; it was not a sky you could look up into, lying on your ba the street, with pleasure, unless pleasure, for you, proceeded from havihreatened, from having been misused. And the underside of the balloon leasure to look up into, we had seen to that, muted grays and browns for the most part, trast<tt>?９9ｌiｂ?t>ed with walnut and soft, fotten yellows. And so, while this man was thinking sul?lied, still there was an admixture of pleasurable ition in his thinking, struggling with the i?nal perception.
Another man, oher hand, might view the balloon as if it were part of a system of unantici?pated rewards, as when ones employer walks in and says, "Here, Henry, take this package of money I have ed for you, because we have been doing so well in the business here, and I admire the way you bruise the tulips, without which bruis?ing your department would not be a success, or at least not the success that it is." For this man the balloon might be a brilliantly heroic "muscle and pluck" experience, even if an experience poorly uood.
Another man might say, "Without the example of ____, it is doubtful that ____ would exist today in its present form," and find many to agree with him, or tue with him. Ideas of "bloat" and "float" were introduced, as well as cepts of dream and responsibility. Others engaged in re?markably detailed fantasies having to do with a wish either to lose themselves in the balloon, or to enge it. The private character of these wishes, of their ins, deeply buried and unkno<tt></tt>wn, was such that they were not much spoken of; yet there is evidehat they were widespread. It was alsued that what was important was what you felt when you stood uhe balloon; some people claimed that they felt sheltered, warmed, as never before, while enemies of the balloo, or re?ported feeling, strained, a "heavy" feeling.
Critical opinion was divided:
"monstrous ps"
"harp"
XXXXXXX "certain trasts with darker po..ions"
"inner joy"
"large, square ers"
"servative eclecticism that has soverned
modern balloon design"
::::::: "abnormal vigor"
"warm, soft, lazy passages"
"Has unity been sacrificed for a sprawling
quality?"
"Quelle catastrophe!"
"mung"
People began, in a curious way, to locate them?selves iion to aspects of the balloon: "Ill be at that place where it dips down into Forty-seventh Street almost to the sidewalk, he Alamo Chile House," or, "Why dont we go stand on top, and take the air, and maybe walk about a bit, where it forms a tight, curving lih the facade of the Gallery of Modern Art --" Marginal interses offered entrances within a given time duration, as well as "warm, soft, lazy passages" in which. . . But it is wrong to speak of "marginal interses," eaterse was crucial, none could be ig?nored (as if, walking there, you might not find someone capable of turning your attention, in a flash, from old exercises to new exercises, risks and escalations). Eaterse was crucial, meet?ing of balloon and building, meeting of balloon and maing of balloon and balloon.
It was suggested that what was admired about the balloon was finally this: that it was not limited, or defined. Sometimes a bulge, blister, or sub?se would carry all the way east to the river on its own initiative, in the manner of an armys movements on a map, as seen in a headquarters remote from the fighting. Then that part would be, as it were, thrown back again, or would withdraw into new dispositions; the m, that part would have made another sortie, or disappeared altogether. This ability of the balloon to shift its shape, to ge, was very pleasing, especially to people whose lives were rather rigidly patterned, persons to whom ge, although desired, was not available. The balloon, for the twenty-two days of its existence, offered the possibility, in its randomness, of mislocation of the self, in tradistinc?tion to the grid of precise, regular pathways under our feet. The amount of specialized training currently needed, and the sequent desirability of long-term itments, has been occasioned by the steadily growing importance of plex ma?ery, in virtually all kinds of operations; as this tendencreases, more and more people will turn, in bewildered inadequacy, to solutions for which the balloon may stand as a prototype, or &quh draft."
I met you uhe balloon, on the occasion of your return from Norway; you asked if it was mine; I said it was. The balloon, I said, is a spontaneous autobiographical disclosure, having to do with the unease I felt at your absence, and with sexual de?privation, but now that your visit ten has been terminated, it is no longer necessary or appro?priate. Removal of the balloon was easy; trailer trucks carried away the depleted fabric, which is now stored i Virginia, awaiting some other time of unhappiness, sometime, perhaps, when we are angry with one another.
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