Chapter 6
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Love is Dangerous31 October 1969 am iation Camp at Dwarka, Gujarat, India
Question 1
A FRIEND HAS ASKED: WHY SHOULD WE THINK OF DEATH AT ALL? WE HAVE LIFE, LET US LIVE IT.
LET US LIVE IN THE PRESENT.
WHY DO WE BRING IHOUGHT OF DEATH?
He has asked the right thing.
But his very asking, "Why bring in the idea of death?" or "Lets just live and<bdi></bdi> not even think of death" shows in itself that even he ot escape thinking about death.
Death is su enormous fact it ot be ignored; although throughout our lives we try not to think of death -- not because death is not worth thinking about, but because the very thought of it is terrifying.
The very idea that "I will die" sends chills up our spines.
Of course, it will shake you up while dying; but even before that, if this idea takes hold of your mind, it will shake you to your very roots.
Man has always tried tet about death, he has tried not to think about it.
We have managed our entire system of life in such a way that death should not bee visible.
All mans efforts and plans towards falsifyih seem to be succeeding, but they never are successful -- because death is there.
How will you escape from it? Where will you escape? Even running away from it, you are ultimately going to run into it.
No matter where you escape, no matter which dire you take, eventually yoing to end up there.
Every day it approaches nearer -- whether you think about it or not, whether you escape from it or not.
One ever run away from a fact.
It is not that death is something which will happen iure, so why think about it now? This too is a misapprehension.
Death will not happen iure -- death is already happening every moment.
Although it will e to its pletion iure, it is actually taking place every moment.
We are dying this very moment.
If we sit here for an hour, we will be dead one hour.
It may take seventy years for us to die pletely, heless this one hour will be a part of it.
During this one hour we will be dying too.
It is not that after seventy years one dies all of a suddeh never occurs instantaneously.
It is not a sudde; it is a growth that begins with birth.
In fact, birth stitutes one end of death, ah stitutes the other end.
This journey begins with birth.
What we call the birthday is actually the first day of death.
It will take time, but the journey will tinue.
For example, a mas out from Dwarka for Calcutta.
The very first step he takes will be as much to reach Calcutta as his last step.
The final step will be as instrumental in bringing him to Calcutta as the initial step.
And if the initial step t bring him to Calcutta, the last step ot either.
This means that wheook his first step towards Calcutta, he began to reach Calcutta.
With each step Calcutta drew nearer and nearer.
You may perhaps say he took six months to arrive at Calcutta, but the fact is that it is only because he had started to arrive six months ago that he could arrive six months later.
The sed thing I would like to say to you is: dont think that death is somewhere iure, death is present every moment.
And what is future? It is the sum total of all of our presents.
We keep on adding to it.
It is just like when we heat water.
At the first degree the water warms up, but it hasnt turned into steam yet.
And the same is the case when it heats up two degrees.
The water will turn into steam when it heats to a hundred degrees; however, it started moving closer to being steam at the first degree, and then at the sed, and the third and so on.
But eves at y-nine degrees the water does not turn into steam; that will only happe reaches one hundred.
Has it ever occurred to you that the huh degree is also a degree, just as the first degree is also a degree? The journey from the y-ninth degree to the huh degree is the same as from the first to the sed degree; there is no difference.
So the one who knows will warn you at the very first degree that the water will turn into steam -- although you never see water turning into steam anywhere.
Of course, he may say the water is heating up, but where is it turning into steam? We delude ourselves up to the y-ninth degree that the water is still not turning into steam, but at the huh degree it is bound to bee steam.
Each degree will keep bringing the boiling point closer.
He is meanio try to save yourself from death, or to postpo by saying that death is iure.
Death is happening every moment; we are dying every day.
In fact, there is virtually no differeween what we call living, and dying.
What we call living is just another name for dying gradually.
I dont say think about the future, I say watch what is already happening now.
I am not asking you to think, even.
This friend has asked, "Why think of death?" I dont say to think.
Thinking will lead you nowhere.
Remember this: no fact ever be known by thinking.
Actually, thinking is a tactful means of falsifying facts.
Looking at a flower, if you begin thinking about it you will never know the flower, because the more you move into thinking about it, the further it will be removed from you.
You will move ahead in your thoughts while the flower will remain lying there.
What has the flower to do with what you are thinking? A flower is a fact.
If you want to know a flower, dont think about it -- look at the flower.
There is a differeween thinking and seeing -- and the difference is signifit.
The West puts great emphasis on thinking.
Thats why they have heir sce of thinking philosophy.
Philosophy means ceptual thinking.
We have he same sce darshan.
Darshan means to see; darshan does not mean thinking.
This o be uood a little.
We have called it darshan while they have called it philosophy, and there is a fual differeweewo.
Those who take philosophy and darshan to be synonymous know nothing.
They are not synonymous.
Thats why theres nothing like Indian philosophy and nothing like Western darshan.
The West has a sce of thinking -- it sists of iigation, logialysis.
The East cared for something else.
The East has experiehat there are certain facts which ever be known by thinking about them.
These facts will have to be seen, will have to be lived.
And there is an enormous differeween living and thinking.
A man who thinks about love may perhaps write a thesis on it, but a lover lives it, sees it; its possible he may not be able to write a thesis.
And if someone asks a lover to say something about love, he may close his eyes, tears may start rolling down his cheeks, and he might say, "Please dont ask.
What I say about love?" One who has thought about love will explain it for hours, but he may not even know oa of love.
Thinking and seeing are two altogether different processes.
So I am not saying you should think about death.
You ever know death by thinking about it.
You will have to see it.
What I am saying is: here is death, right now within you, and you have to see it.
What I call the I is dying all the time.
This phenomenon of death will have to be seen, this phenomenon of death will have to be lived, this phenomenon of death, that "I am dying, I am dying," will have to be accepted.
We try our best to falsify death; we have ied a thousand ways to falsify it.
Of course we dye our white hair, but that does not prove death a lie -- it invariably es.
Even underh the dyed color the hair is still white.
They are the indications that death has started approag, that it is sure to e.
How we falsify it? No matter how much we go on falsifying it, it makes no difference -- it is approag, non-stop.
The only difference is that we fail to know it.
What I am asking is: how will one who hasnt even knowh yet know what life is? My point is: death is on the circumference; life is at the ter.
If we dont even know the circumference, how will we ever know the ter? And if we run away from the circumference, we will never reach closer to the ter.
If you bee frightened of the walls that make up the outer limits of a house, and escape, how will you ever ehe inner dwelling? Death is the periphery and life is the temple at the ter of it.
By running away from the periphery, we also run away from life.
One who es to know death will, by and by, u and begin to uand life as well.
Death is the gateway to knowing life.
Eludih is eluding life as well.
So when I say "Know death,&quhe facts -- I am not asking you to think.
There is one more iing thing that o be uood.
Thinking means to repeat, in the mind, what we already know.
Thinking is never inal -- although we ordinarily say that sud-such a persons thoughts are highly inal.
No, thought is never inal.
Thoughts ever be inal.
Darshan, seeing, be inal.
Thoughts are always stale.
If I ask you to think about this roseflower, what will you think? You will simply reiterate what you already know about a rose.
What else would you do? What else you do with thinking? Could even one single unheard-of and inal viewpoint about a rose ever appear in your thoughts? How it?
Thinking is nothing but reiterating a thought.
You may say, "The roseflower is very beautiful," but how many times have you heard this before? How many times have you read this before? Or you may say, "The roseflower is just as beautiful as the fay beloved.
" How many times have you heard this before too? How many times have you read it before? Or you may say, "The flower is very fresh" -- but this too, how many times have you heard or read it before? What good are thoughts? How will you be able to ehe being of that roseflower by thinking about it? Thinking only lead you into whatsoever is in your memory about a rose.
Thats why thinking is never inal.
There ever be an inal thinker -- only seers are inal.
The first dition in looking at a roseflower is that the person looking at it should not think.
He should remove thoughts from his memory; he should bee empty, and live in that moment with the flower.
Let the roseflower be on one side and you be oher, ahere be no oween you -- nothing youve ever heard, nothing youve ever read, nothing youve ever known.
Nothing youve ever experienced should be iween.
No one should be between you two.
Only then, the unknowed within the rose will begin to enter your being.
Finding no hindran between, it will enter, and then you wont feel you want to know the rose, you will feel you are oh the rose.
Then you will know the flower from its interiority.
A seer pees inside an object, while a thinker hovers around it oside -- and therefore a thinker has no achievement of his own; only a seer enjoys achievement.
A seer pees within because there remains no wall between him and the object before him -- the wall crumbles, disappears.
Once Kabir asked his son Kamal to go to the forest and bring some hay for their cattle.
Kamal went as he was told.
It was m when he left, but when the sun was overhead and Kamal had not yet returned, Kabir became worried.
And even by the waning hours of afternoon there was no sign of Kamal.
Kabir grew even more worried.
Soon it was evening and the sun was about to set, so finally, apanied by a few of his devotees, Kabir set out in search of Kamal.
When they reached the forest they found Kamal standing in the middle of the thick grass, his eyes closed, swaying like a blade of grass in the breeze.
Kabir went over, shook him, and asked, "What are you doing here?" Kamal opened his eyes.
He came to himself, realized what had happened, and immediately apologized.
Kabir said, "But what have you been doing for so long? Its so late!"
Kamal answered, "I am sorry, but when I came here, instead of cutting the grass I began to look at it.
And just looking at it tinuously, I dont know when, but I also became a blade of grass.
Soon it was evening, and here I was, pletely oblivious that I am Kamal who has e here to cut grass.
I became the grass itself.
There was so much joy in being the grass, joy that, being Kamal, I never had before.
Its good you came, because I didnt know what was happening.
The breeze was not moving the grass, the breeze was moving me -- the cutter and that which was to be cut had both disappeared.
"
Have you ever seen your wife, your son, with whom you have lived for so many years? Have you ever seehe things your wife did yesterday flash through your mind -- and a thought es iween you and her.
You recall how she quarreled when you were about to leave for the offi the m -- and agaihought is preseween you.
What she said at the diable es back to you -- and the thought stands between you.
You have always thought, you have never seen.
And thats the reason there is ionship between husband and wife, between father and soween mother and son.
Relationship happens where thought is no more and where darshan, seeing, has begun.
That is really when a relationship takes place, because then no os to disrupt it.
Remember, a relationship does not mean there is a third factor binding the two.
As long as there is something iween to bind the two, the disrupter is also present.
That which binds also breaks.
The day nothis to bind, when only two remain, when nothing remains iween, that day what actually remains is only ohen there are not two.
A relationship does not mean we are joined with somebody, a relationship means that now nothis between you and the other person, there is no one iween -- not even to join you.
There, the two streams disappear and merge into each other.
This is love.
Seeing leads you into love; seeing is the source of love.
And one who has not loved has never known anything.
No matter what a man may have set out to know, he has only known it through love.
So when I say death has to be known, I mean we will have to love death as well.
We will have to see death.
But the man who is afraid of death, who is eluding it -- how he love death, how he have its darshan, how he ever see death? Wheh appears before him, he turns his ba it.
He shuts his eyes; he never lets death appear before him, face-to-face.
He is afraid, he is frightehats why he is uo see death at all, nor is he able to love it.
And the man who hasnt been able to love death yet, how will he ever love life? -- because death is a very superficial event and life is a far deeper phenomenon.
One who turned away from the very first step, how will he ever reach the deep waters of the well?
Thats why I say death will have to be lived, it will have to be known, it will have to be seen.
You will have to fall in love with it; you will have to look into its eyes.
And as soon as a man looks into deaths eyes, begins to watch it, pee into it, he feels astounded.
To his great amazement, he realizes, "What a great mystery lies hidden ih! What I knew as death a running away from, actually ceals within itself the source of supreme life.
" Hence I say to you: enter into death willingly so that you may reach life.
There is an incredible saying of Jesus.
Jesus has said, "The one who will save himself will perish; and the one who will efface himself -- no one ever destroy him.
One who will lose himself shall find, and one who will save himself shall be lost.
" If a seed wishes to save itself, it will rot -- what else? And if a seed annihilates itself in the earth, disappears, it will bee a tree.
The death of the seed bees life for the tree.
If the seed were to protect itself by saying, "I am scared.
I could die.
I dont want to disappear.
Why should I disappear?" then the seed is bound to rot.
In that case, it will not even remain a seed, let alone grow into a tree.
We shrink with fear of death.
I would like to say one more thing that may not have occurred to you before.
Only one who is afraid of death has ego, because ego means a stricted personality, a solid knot.
One who has fear of death shrinks within.
Anyone in fear has to shrink inside, and whatever shrinks turns into a knot.
A plex is created ihe person.
The feeling of I is the feeling of a man afraid of death.
The man who pees death, who is not afraid of death, who does not run away from it, who begins to live it -- his I disappears, his ego disappears.
And when the ego disappears only life remains.
ut it this way: only the ego dies, not the soul.
But since we tio remain egos, a great difficulty is created.
In fact, only the ego die; only the ego has a death -- because it is false.
It will have to die.
But we are holding on to it></a>.
For example, a wave rises in an o.
If the wave wants to survive as a wave, it ot; it is bound to die.
How a wave survive as a wave? It will die.
Unless, of course, it bees ice.
If it tracts, bees solid, then it survive.
But still, in that sort of survival the wave is no more and the ice remains -- ice which is a wave, closed, broken away from the o.
Remember, as a wave it is not apart from the o, it is oh the o.
As ice, it parts from the o, it separates, it bees solid.
In it, the wave has tracted; it has bee frozen.
As a wave it was oh the o; however, if it bees a k of ice it will survive, of course, but then it will be cut off from the o.
And how long will it survive in that state? Whatsoever is frozen will undoubtedly melt.
A poor wave will melt a little sooner, while a rich wave will take a little longer -- what else? The sunrays will take a little loo melt a big wave, while a smaller wave will melt sooner.
It is only a question of time, but melting is bound to happen.
The wave will melt and it will make a big hue and cry, because as soon as it melts it will disappear.
But if the wave, by falling bato the o, were to make itself cease to exist as separate, if it were to e to know that it is in fact the o, then there wouldnt be any question of the waves disappearing.
Theher it disappears or remains, it still exists -- because it knows that "I am not a wave, I am the o.
" When it disappears as a wave, it still exists -- in a state of rest.
When it rises, it is in a state of activity.
Aing is no less enjoyable than being active.
In fact, it is even more enjoyable.
There is a state of activity and there is a state of rest.
What we call samsara, the world, is the state of activity, and what we call moksha, liberation, is the state of rest.
It is like a restless wave which crashes against the wind and wrestles with it, and then it falls bato the o and disappears.
It still exists.
Whatever it was before in the o, it is now still the same, but it is at rest.
However, if a wave were to assert itself as a wave, it would be filled with ego, and then it would want to break itself away from the o.
Once you get the idea that "I am," then how you be with the rest of the all? If you choose to be with the all, then the I is lost.
Thats why the I insists, "Break away from the all.
" And how iing it is, that breaking away from the whole makes you miserable.
And then, once again, the "I" says, "Relate with the all" -- such is the tortuous way of the "I".
First the "I" says, "Break yourself away from the all, isolate yourself; you are different from the whole.
How you remain ected?" So the "I" snaps itself away; but then it gets into trouble -- because, as soon as the "I" separates from the all, it bees miserable; its end approaches.
As soon as the wave es to believe it is separate from the o, it begins to die, its death es nearer.
Now it will fall into the struggle to protect itself from death.
As long as it was oh the o, there was h at all -- because the o never dies.
Remember, an o be without a wave but a wave ot exist without the o.
You ot ceive of a wave without the o -- the o will be present in the wave.
The o, however, exist without a wave.
When they are an integral part of the o, all waves exist in pead rest.
But the moment a wave strives to save itself from the o, difficulties arise -- it cuts itself off from the o and its death begins.
This is the reason one who is to die wants to love.
The reason all of us, whoing to die, are so eager to love is that love is the obvious means to ect.
Thats why no one wants to live without love and be miserable.
Everyone is seeking love: somebody wants to receive your love, somebody wants to give you love.
And for the man who does not find love it bees a problem.
But have we ever wondered what the meaning of love is?
Love means an attempt to restruct, once again, by putting different parts together, the relationship we have broken off with the whole.
So one kind of love is the one where we attempt to rebuild our lost relationship with the whole by adding parts.
This is what we call love.
And there is another kind of love where we have stopped our attempts to break away from the whole.
That is called prayer.
Hence, prayer is absolute love.
And this carries a totally different meaning.
It does not mean that we are attempting to ie the fragments; it means we have stopped breaking ourselves away from the whole.
The wave has declared, "I am the o," and now it is not attempting to ect itself with ead every other wave.
Remember, the wave itself is dying, and the other waves nearby are dying too.
If this wave tries to relate with other waves, it will get into trouble.
Thats why our so-called love is very painful, because it is a wave trying to relate with another wave.
This wave and the other wave are both dying, ahey get into a relationship with each other in the hope that by joining with each other they perhaps may save themselves.
Thats why we turn love into security.
So man is afraid to live alone.
One wants a wife, a husband, a son, a mother, a brother, a friend, a society, an anization, a nation.
These are all endeavors of the ego; these are attempts by one who has broken himself away from it, to unite once again with the whole.
But all these efforts to unite are invitations to death -- because the oh whom you are f a union is as much surrounded by death, as much surrounded by the ego
The funny thing is that the other wants to bee immortal by uniting with you, and you want to bee immortal by uniting with the other.
And the fact is that both of yoing to die.
How you bee immortal? Such a union will double death; it will certainly not turn it into an elixir.
Two lovers long so much for their love to bee immortal -- they sing songs day and night.
For eternity poems have been written about love being immortal.
How two people whoing to die desire immortality together? A union of two such people only makes death twice as real and nothing else.
What else it be? And both are melting, sinking, fading away; thats why they are frightened, worried.
The wave has created its own anization.
It says, "I have to survive.
" It has created nations; it has created Hindu-Mohammedas -- waves creating their own anizations.
And the fact of the matter is that all these anizations are going to disappear -- the o below is the only anization.
And the anization of the o is a totally different thing.
Belonging to it does not mean the wave joins itself with the o; rather, it means the wave knows that "I am not at all different from the o.
" And so I say that a religious man does not belong to any anization -- he her holds to a family, nor does he own a friend, a father or a brother.
Jesus has spoken some very strong words.
In fact, only those who have attaio love speak such strong words; people weak in love ot utter them.
One day Jesus was standing in the market surrounded by a crowd.
His mother, Mary, came to see him.
People began to make way for her.
Somebody from the crowd shouted, "Make way, make room for Jesus mother.
Let her e.
" When Jesus heard him, he said in a loud voice, "If yiving way to Jesus mother, then dont do it, because Jesus doesnt have a mother.
" Mary stopped, stood there in shock.
Addressing the crowd, Jesus said, "As long as you have a mother, a father, a brother, you wont be able to e close to me.
" This is being very harsh.
We t even imagine a person like Jesus, so full of love, utter such words as, "I have no mother.
Who is my mother?" So Mary stood there in shock.
Jesus went on, "Do you call this woman my mother? I have no mother.
And remember, if you still have a mother, then you wont be able to e near me.
"
What seems to be the matter? The question is that if a wave is attempting to uh another wave, it wont be able to e close to the o.
Waves, in fact, uh each other and create an anization mainly to save themselves from the o.
On its own a wave feels more frightehat it may disappear, that it may really disappear.
But the truth is, it is already disappearing.
Yet when a few waves gather together they feel more reassured -- some sort anization is created; a crowd is created.
Thats why man likes to live in a crowd; he feels afraid if he is left alone.
In its loneliness a wave is left totally by itself -- slipping away, falling away, vanishing, close to disappearing, feeling alienated on both sides -- the o ohe rest of the waves oher.
He creates an anization, it creates a .
The father says, "I will disappear, but it doesnt matter -- I will leave my son behind.
" The wave says, "Ill disappear, but Ill leave a little wave -- it will survive after me, the will tinue, my name shall remain.
" Thats why a father feels unhappy if he doesnt have a son -- it means he couldnt arrange his immortality.
He will of course be gone, but he wants to create another wave which will tinue further on, which will at least identify the wave it came from.
So its all right for the former wave to disappear -- it leaves another one behind.
You may or may not have noticed that people who are engaged in a creative activity -- a painter, a musi, a poet, a writer -- are not too ed with having sons, simply because they have found a substitute.
Their paintings will survive, their poetry will survive, their sculptures will survive; they dont care about having a son.
Thats why stists, painters, sculptors, writers and poets are not overly ed with having sons.
There is no other reason except that they have found a different kind of son.
They have created a wave which will remain long after they are gone.
Actually, they have found a son that will last even lohan yours, because even when your son has disappeared, the writers book will still remain.
A writer doesnt care much about having a son, about having an offspring.
This does not mean, however, that he is carefree; it simply means he has found a long-lasting wave; he stops w about smaller waves.
Hence he is not ied in having a family; he has created a different kind of family.
He is also striving for the same degree of immortality.
So he will say, "Money will be lost, wealth will be lost, but my work, my scripture will survive" -- and that is precisely what he wants.
But scriptures also bee lost.
No scripture lasts forever, although of course it lasts a little longer.
Who knows how many scriptures have already been lost, and how ma lost everyday.
Everything will be lost.
In fact, in the world of waves, no matter to what extent a wave may prolong itself, ultimately it is bound to be lost.
To be a wave means to face extin -- prolonging makes no difference.
So if you look upon yourself as a wave you will want to avoid death -- you will remain afraid, scared.
I say to you: look at death -- her should you avoid it nor be afraid of it, nor run away from it.
Look at it.
And just by looking at it you will find that what seemed like death from this end, as you enter into it a little, the same thing turns out to be life.
Then the wave bees the o; its fear of extin disappears.
Then it doesnt want to bee frozen ice.
Then, for whatever time it has, it dances in the sky, rejoices uhe rays of the sun, is happy.
And when it falls bato the o, it is equally happy in its state of rest.
Thus it is happy in life, it is happy ih -- because it knows that "that which is" is never born nor does it ever die.
That which is, is; only forms keep ging.
We are all waves risen above the o of sciousness.
Some of us have turned into ice -- most of us have.
The ego is like ice, as hard as a rock.
How amazing it is that a fluid like water bee hard like id rock.
If a desire to freeze arises in us, the sciousness, otherwise so simple and fluid, freezes and bees an ego.
We are all filled with desire to freeze, and so we employ many kinds of means to see how we bee frozen, solidified.
There are laws under which water turns into ice, and there are also laws which cause the formation of the ego.
Water has to cool in order to bee ice, it has to lose its heat, it has to turn cold.
The colder it gets, the harder it bees.
The man who wants to create ego has to bee cold as well; he has to lose his warmth.
Thats why we say "a warm wele.
" A wele is always warm; a cold wele has no meaning.
Love means warmth; a cold love carries no meaning.
Love is never cold, it tains warmth.
Actually, life is sustained by warmth; death is cold, below zero.
Thats why the sun is the symbol of life, the sun is the symbol of warmth.
When it rises in the m, death departs; everything bees warm and hot.
The flowers bloom and the birds begin to sing.
Warmth is the symbol of life, cold is the symbol of death.
So one who wants to create an ego has to bee cold, and in order to bee cold he has to lose all those things which give warmth.
He has to lose everything that gives warmth to his being.
For example, love gives warmth, hatred brings ess.
So for the sake of the ego, one has to give up love and g to hatred.
Merd sympathy bring warmth; cruelty and ruthlessness bring cold.
Just as there are laws for the freezing of water, there are laws for the freezing of human sciousness.
The same law works: keep on being cold.
Sometimes we say that sud-such a person is very cold -- there is no warmth in him; he bees hard like a rock.
And remember, the warmer a person is the more simple he is.
Then his life has a liquidity that enables him to flow into others and allows others to flow into him.
A cold person bees hard, uo flow, closed from all sides.
No one enter into him, nor he enter into anyone.
The ego is like frozen id love is like water, fluid, flowing.
The man who is afraid of death will run away from it.
He will go on freezing, because that fear that he may die, that he may disappear, will make him tract -- and his ego will remain, growing harder, stronger.
I was a guest at a friends house for a few days.
He is quite rich, with a great deal of property.
But I uzzled about ohing: he would never speak kindly to aherwise he was a good man.
I was very puzzled to see that inwardly he was very soft, but very hard oside.
The servant trembled before him, his son trembled before him, his wife was scared to face him.
People thought about it a good deal before they called on him.
Evehey came to his door they hesitated t the bell, w whether they should go in or not.
When I stayed with him and came to know him closely, I asked him what all this was about.
I said, "As such, you are a very simple man.
" He said, "I am very scared.
It is dangerous to form a relationship, because if you form a relationship with somebody then sooner or later he starts asking for money.
If you remain courteous and loving to your wife, the expenditures shoot up.
If you dont remain stiff with your son, his pocket money goes on increasing.
If you talk to your servaly, he also tries to behave like a boss.
"
So a solid wall of ess had to be erected all around -- that would scare the wife, that would scare the son.
How many fathers have dohis?
The truth of the matter is that there is hardly any home where the father and the so each other lovingly.
The soo the father when he needs mohe father goes to the son when he wants to give him a sermon; otherwise the two do, the meeting never happens.
There is ing poiween a father and a son.
The father is afraid, and he has surrounded himself with a solid wall.
The son is also afraid; he sneaks by his father.
There is no harmony anywhere betweewo.
The more a person is afraid, the more he worries about his security, the more solid he bees.
There is great danger in being fluid, there is insecurity in it.
This is the reason we are afraid of falling in love.
Only after we have scrutihe person and bee totally reassured do we ever fall in love.
That means, first we make sure there is no cause for danger from the person, then we fall in love.
Thats why we ied marriages -- first we marry, first we take all the necessary measures, then we fall in love -- because love is dangerous.
Love is fluid, a man might find his way into anyone.
It is dangerous to fall in love with a stranger; he may sneak off at night with all your valuables! So first we make absolutely certain who the man is, what he does, where his parents are from, how his character is, what his qualities are.
We take all the measures, we take the full social precautions; only then do t the individual in marriage.
We are a frightened people; we want to make everything secure first.
The more we secure ourselves, the harder and colder the wall of ice is all around us, and it shrinks our entire being.
Our separatiod has happened because of one reason alone: we are not liquid, we have bee solid.
This is the only cause of separation: we are not flowing, we have bee like blocks; we are not like water, we are like frozen ice.
Once we bee fluid-like, the separation will no longer exist; but we will only bee fluid-like when we agree to see and to live death, when t that death exists.
Once we have seen and reized that death exists, why should there be any fear? Wheh is surely there, when the wave knows for certain she is bound to disappear; if the wave has found out that birth itself taih, if the wave has e to know that its disiion began the very moment it was created, the matter is finished.
Now why turn into ice? Then it will accept being a wave as long as it has to be, and it will accept being the o as long as it has to be.
Thats it! The matter is over! Thehing is accepted.
In that acceptahe wave bees the o.
Then all worry over its disappearance is gone, because then the wave knows it existed before its extin and it will tio exist even after it has vanished -- not as the I, but as the boundless o.
When Lao Tzu was about to die, somebody asked him to reveal a few secrets of his life.
Lao Tzu said, "The first secret is: no one has ever defeated me in my life.
"
Hearing this, the disciples became very excited.
They said, "You old us this before! We also wish to be victorious.
Please show us the trick.
"
Lao Tzu answered, "You made a mistake.
You heard something different.
I said no one could ever defeat me, and you are saying you too want to be victorious.
The two things are totally opposite, although they look similar in meaning.
In the diary, in the world of language, it has one meaning -- that a person who has not faced defeat is victorious.
I simply said no one could defeat me, while you are talking about being victorious.
Get out of here! You will never uand what I am saying.
The disciples pleaded, "Even so, please explain to us.
Please show us the teique.
How were you never defeated?"
Lao Tzu said, "No one could defeat me because I always remained defeated.
There is no way to defeat a defeated m<big>.</big>an.
I was never defeated because I never wished for victory.
In fao one could pick a fight with me.
If anyone ever came to challenge me he found me already defeated, so he couldnt have any fuing me.
The joy is iing one who desires to be victorious.
What fun there be iing someone who doesnt even want to win?"
Actually, it gives us pleasure to destroy somebodys ego because doing sthens our own.
But if a man has already effaced himself, what fun there be iroying such a person? o would any kick out of it.
The more we succeed in breaking the o, the stronger ours bees.
The others broken ego bees the strength of our own.
But the ego of this man we are talking about is already broken.
For example, you go out to defeat a man, and before you knock him down he lays himself down on the ground; and before you sit on him he invites you as you sit on him.
What will your state be then? You would want to run away from there! What else could you do? People watg would laugh and say, "Go on, sit on him; sit fortably.
Why are you running away?" Who would look stupid, the one who sat on the man, or the man who kept laughing and whose laughter resouhroughout your life?
So whenever somebody went to challehis man, he would immediately lie down on the ground and say, "e on, sit on me.
You have e for that, havent you? So go ahead.
Dont take too much trouble, dont bother too much; theres o exert yourself -- just e and sit on me.
"
Lao Tzu went on to say, "But you are asking something else.
You wao tell you the teique of winning.
If you think of winning, you will lose.
One who harbors the thought of winning is always the loser.
In fact, defeat begins with the very idea of victory.
" And Lao Tzu said further, "And no one has ever been able to insult me.
"
"Please tell us its secret also, because we do not like to be insulted either," a disciple said.
"Once again you are making a mistake.
No one could insult me because I never desired honor.
You will always be insulted because you are filled with the desire fnition.
I was never kicked out from any place, because I always sat he entrance where people remove their shoes.
I was never asked to move from a place because I always stood at the end, where no one could push me further back.
I was very happy to be at the end; it saved me from all sorts of trouble.
No one ever forced me out of there or pushed me aside; nor did anyone say, Get lost! because that was the last place.
There was no place beyond that.
No one ever wao be in that spot.
I was the lord of my own place; I have always been the lord of my own place.
Where I stood, no one ever came to throw me out.
"
Jesus also says, "Blessed are those who are ready to stand in the last row.
" What does this mean?
For example, Jesus says, "If a man slaps yht cheek, offer him the left.
" What this means is: dont even give him the trouble of turning your other cheek -- you do it for him.
Jesus says, "When someone es to defeat you, be defeated readily.
If he makes you lose one round, lose two instead.
" And Jesus says, "If a man snatches your coat, also give him your shirt immediately.
" Why? -- because it is possible the man may feel embarrassed taking the shirt away from you.
And Jesus says, "If someone asks you to carry his load for a mile, at the end of the mile ask him if he would like you to carry it further.
"
What does this mean? This means that by accepting the facts of life totally ing insecurity, failure, defeat, and finally death, we quer them all.
Otherwise, these facts eventually lead us nowhere but to death.
In the final analysis, death is our total defeat.
Even in the biggest defeats, you still survive; although defeated, you tio exist.
But ih even you are annihilated as well.
Death is the biggest defeat of all; thats ant to kill our enemy -- there is no other reason.
Death is the ultimate defeat; after that there is no possibility for the eo win, ever.
The urge to kill an enemy es from our desire to infli him the ultimate defeat.
After that there is no way he ever be a winner, because then he exists no more.
Death is the final defeat, and we all want to run away from it.
And remember also, the man who attempts to escape his owh will tio work towards the killing of others.
The more he succeeds in killing others, the more alive he will feel.
Hehe reason for all the violen the world is totally different from eople ordinarily take it to be.
The reason for this violence is not that it is caused because people dont drink unstrained water or they eat after su, no, it is nothing of that sort.
The fual reason for violence is that man kills others tet about his owh.
Killing others, he believes no one kill him, because now he himself has the power to kill.
Hitler, Genghis Khan, and other such people, killed millions in order to assure themselves that "No one kill me, since I kill millions myself.
" By killing others we try to be free of our owh, we want to firm our independence.
The assumption is that, when we ourselves are capable of killing people, who kill us?
Deep down, this is avoidih.
Deep down, a violent man is an escapist from death.
And one who wants to save himself from death ever be nonviolent.
Only he who declares, "I accept death, for death is one of the facts of life -- it is a reality," be a nonviolent person.
One ever deh.
Where will you run from it? Where will you go?
The sun begins to set the moment it rises.
A su is as much a reality as the sunrise -- the difference is only of dire.
At suhe sun reaches exactly where it was at sunrise -- but at su is in the east, whereas at su is in the west.
Birth is on one side, death is oher.
That which is asding on one side is deing oher.
The rising and the setting go together -- the setting, in fact, lies hidden in the rising.
Death lies hidden in birth.
There is no way that one who knows that such is the case ever deny it.
Then he accepts everything.
Then he lives this truth.
He knows it, he sees it, and he accepts it.
With acceptanes transformation.
When I say "triumph over death," I mean that as soon as a person accepts death he laughs, because he es to know there is h.
Only the outer sheath is formed and unformed.
The o has always been; it is only the wave which has taken form and then disied.
Beauty was always around -- the flowers bloomed and withered away.
Light always shone -- the sun rose a.
And that which shoh the rising aing of the sun was forever present, before sunrise and after su.
But this we will e to see only when we have seeh, when we have had the vision of death, when we have entered death face-to-face -- never before.
So the friend asks: "Why should we think about death? Why not fet it? Why not just live?" I would like to say to him that, fettih, no one has ever lived, nor anyone ever live.
And one who ignores death also ignores life.
It is just as if I have a in my hand and I say, "Why bother about the reverse side of the ? Why not just fet it?" If I give up the reverse side, then I will lose the front side of the too, because both make two sides of the same .
It isnt possible to save one side of the and throw the other side oreet.
How this be possible? With the one I keep, the other side will automatically be saved.
If I throw away one, both will be thrown away; if I save one, both will be saved.
Actually, both are aspects of the same thing.
Birth ah are tects of the same life.
The day one realizes this, not only does the sting of death depart, the thought of not dying disappears as well.
Then one es to know that birth is there and so is death.
Both prise bliss.
We get up every m and go to work.
Somebody goes and digs ditches
Different people do different jobs -- people sweat the whole day.
There is a joy iing up in the m, but isnt it equally joyful to sleep at night? If a few madmeo start ving people not to sleep at night, theing up in the m would also stop, because the man who wouldnt sleep wouldnt be able to wake up in the m either.
The whole of life would e to a halt.
One might feel afraid to go to bed, arguing, "It is such a joy to wake up in the m, it is better not to fall asleep or else it will spoil the whole charm of waking up.
" But we know this is ridiculous: sleeping is the other side of waking up.
One who sleeps right will wake up right.
One who wakes up right will sleep right.
One who lives properly will die properly.
One who dies properly will take the right steps in his future life.
One who does not die in a right manner will not live rightly.
One who does not live rightly will not die rightly.
It will be a mess; everything will bee ugly and distorted.
The fear of death is responsible for creating the ugliness and the distortion.
If a fear of falling asleep were to overtake somebody, it would make life difficult.
An old lady was brought to me by her son.
He said his mother was too afraid to fall asleep.
I asked him, "How did this happen?"
He said, "She has been ill lately, and she feels she may die in her sleep, so she is afraid of falling asleep.
She fears she wont wake up once she goes to sleep, so she keeps trying to stay up the whole night.
We are in big trouble.
She isnt rec from her illness because she stays up all night, afraid she may not wake up alive.
Please do something and save her from this fear; otherwise I am irouble.
"
In a way, sleeping is like dying every day.
The whole day we are alive; the whole night we are dead.
This is like dying in parts, dying a bit every day.
We dive within ourselves at night and e out refreshed in the m.
By the time we are seventy hty, the body is worn out.
Theh takes over.
And with that, this body goes through a plete ge.
But we are very scared of death, although it is nothing more than a deep sleep.
Do you know that the body undergoes ge ht and es out different every m? The ge is so minimal you dont notice it.
The ge is not total, it is a partial transformation.
When you go to bed at night, tired and weary, your body is iate, and when you wake up in the m it is in a different state.
In the m the body feels fresh and rejuvenated; it is filled with energy, ready to faother day of activity.
Now, once again, you sing new songs, something you couldnt do the previous evening.
Then you were tired, broken, worn out.
You have never wondered however, why there is so much fear of death.
When you wake up in the m you feel happy, because only a part of your body ges in sleep -- but death, oher hand, brings about a plete ge.
The whole body bees useless and the need arises to acquire a new body.
But we are scared of death and so our whole life has bee totally crippled.
Every moment is filled with fear of death.
Because of this fear we have created a life, a society, a family which lives the least but fears death the most.
And one who fears death ever live -- both things ot exist together.
The man who is ready to meet death with absolute spoy, he alone is ready to live as well.
Life ah are both aspects of the same phenomenon.
Thats why I say: look at death.
I am not asking you to think about death, because such thinking will mislead you.
Thinking about death, what will you do?
A sid miserable man may find it gratifying to think that everything ends ih.
The thought is gratifying to this man not because it is right.
Remember, never believe that what seems pleasing to you is necessarily true, because what feels pleasing does not depend on what is true, it depends on what you think of as ve.
A person who is miserable, troubled, sid in pain feels he should meet a total death, that nothing should be left behind -- because if any part of him does survive, then it would obviously mean he would survive
.
he, the miserable, sidividual.
Question 2
A FRIEND HAS ASKED: SOME PEOPLE IT SUICIDE.
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THEM? ARE THESE PEOPLE NOT AFRAID OF DEATH?
They are afraid of death too.
But they are more afraid of life than of death.
Life seems more painful to them thah; hehey want to finish it.
Putting ao their lives does not mean they find any joy ih, but since life appears worse thah to them, they prefer death.
One who is miserable, living in pain, will readily believe that death takes e<mark>..</mark>verything away -- including the soul -- that death leaves nothing behind.
He obviously does not want to save any part of himself, because if he does he will be saving nothing but his misery and pain.
One who is afraid of death and wants to save himself, readily accepts the belief in the immortality of the soul.
These are all veniences.
It does not show uanding, it merely shows our for venience.
This sort of acceptance feels fortable, thats all.
Thats why we ge our beliefs many times.
A man who was an atheist in his youth bees a theist in his old age.
In fact, the truth is that beliefs ge with headaches.
When the head has no pain we follow o of beliefs; with a headache these beliefs are replaced by another set.
It is hard to say how much the scriptures affect your belief system and how much your liver does! One t be sure whether gurus or the liver affect it more! What goes on ihe body has a greater effect.
Wheomach is upset one feels like being an atheist, and wheomach is okay one feels like believing in God! How a man possibly believe that there is a God when he has a headache? If God exists and so does the headache, how you ect the two?
We run an experiment.
Take fifty men and ihem with ic diseases, ahe other fifty in good health.
Let the first fifty live in misery ahe other fifty live happy lives.
You will find that atheism will increase in the froup and theism will increase iter group.
It is not that happiness is caused by believing in God; a miserable mind iably bees atheistic.
So remember, if you see atheism increasing around the world, know well that misery must be on the increase too.
If you see an increasing number of people believing in God, you should know that more and more people are being happy.
I say to you, therefore, that in the fifty years there is a great possibility that Russia will bee theistid India will bee even more atheistic.
Beliefs dont mean anything.
In Russia people read Marx, while in India you read Mahavira -- this makes no difference.
The works of Mahavira and Marx ake the least difference.
If people were to go on being happier in Russia, then in the fifty years theism would revive there and the bells would begin t in Russian temples.
Lamps would be lit and prayers would be ted.
Only a happy mind rings bells iemple, kindles lamps and ts prayers.
People would begin to thank God.
Only a happy mind wishes to thank somebody, and who else should ohank? -- because a man find no reasons for the presence of inner happiness, so he thanks the unknown; it must be because of it.
An unhappy mind wants to express its anger.
And when the person finds no cause for being unhappy, then who should he be angry at? He obviously bees filled with bitterowards the unknown.
He says, "The whole mess is because of that unknown one, because of God.
Either he does , or he has gone mad.
" What I am saying is that our theism and our atheism, our beliefs -- all of them are the products of veniehat suit our ditions.
One who wants to escape from death will iably grab hold of some belief.
Similarly, someone who wishes to die will also grab on to some belief.
But her of them is eager, anxious to know death.
There is a vast differeween veniend truth.
hink too much about venience.
A thought is always about venience.
A vision is always of truth; a thought is always of venience.
One man is a unist.
He makes a lot of noise -- there should be a revolution, the poor should be poor no longer, property must be divided, and so on.
Now just give him a car, a big bungalow and a beautiful girl to marry, and in fifteen days you will see a totally different man.
You will hear him say, "unism, etcetera -- its all nonsense!" What happeo this man? What was veo him shaped his thinking.
The other day it was ve for him to think that the property be divided; now it is inveo think that property be divided.
Now the division of property would mean dividing his car, dividing his bungalow.
The man who doesnt have a beautiful woman very well say that women should also be socialized.
Why should some men have a monopoly over beautiful women? Women should belong to all.
There are people who think this way.
There are people on this earth who propound, "Today property, tomorrow women.
" And there is nothing wrong in it, because all along you have beeing women as your property anyway.
If one says, "It is wrong that one man should live in a big house and the other in a shanty," then what is the problem iioning, "Why should one man have a pretty woman and another man not? The division should be equal.
" These are danger signals.
Sooner or later such questions will surely e up.
The day property is distributed, the question of sharing women is bound to arise.
But the man who has a beautiful woman will certainly protest.
He will say, "How this be possible? What nonsense are you talking about? This is all wrong!"
So venience shapes our thinking; our thoughts are formed out of venience.
All our thoughts either foster our venience or remove our invenience.
A vision is something else.
A vision has nothing to do with venience.
Remember, therefore, that having a vision is a tapascharya, a deep personal itment to knowing the truth.
Tapascharya means one is not ed with veniences; instead, one has to know whatever is, whichever way it is.
So the fact of death has to be seen, not thought about.
You will think acc to your venience; your venieermines your thinking.
It is not a question of venience.
We have to know what death is, see it as it is.
Your veniences and inveniences make no difference.
Whatsoever is, that has to be known.
As soon as you e to know it a transformation happens in your life -- because death is not.
The moment you know death, you e to realize that it is not.
You believe in its existenly as long as you have not known it.
The experience of ignorance is death; the experience of awareness is immortality.
There are a few more questions which we will be able to discuss during the night session.
Noill sit for the m meditation.
Meditation meah.
Meditation means to move into what is, where we are.
Therefore one moves into meditation only when one is ready for dying, not otherwise.
Be seated with a little distance from each other.
Be seated making a little space around yourself.
Those who want to lie down, do so beforehand.
Also, if someone feels like lying down during the experiment he should do so.
And sit at a little distance from each other so that no one falls over you if someone lies down, or falls over.
Close your eyes
.
leave your eyes relaxed and close the eyelids
.
leave your eyes relaxed and close the eyelids.
Relax your body
.
relax your body
.
relax your body
Leave the body pletely relaxed as if there is no life in it.
One day life will leave you, so feel it by dropping it now.
One day life will leave you totally; even if you want to keep it, it wont stay.
So pull the same life deep within
.
ask the life to retreat within, and leave the body relaxed.
Go on relaxing the body pletely.
Now I will give some suggestions, and you feel them along with me.
The body is relaxing
.
feel it, the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing.
Go on loosening it, feel that the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing.
The body goes on relaxing
.
goes on dying
.
goes on dying.
We are going on slipping ihere where life is.
Let go
.
let go
.
let go of the wave, be oh the o.
Let go of the body pletely, let it fall if it wants to, dont worry about it.
Do not prevent it
.
do not keep any hold over it
.
let go
The body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing
.
the body is going on relaxing
.
the body is relaxing
.
the body is relaxing.
Let go
.
as if it is dead, as if the body has bee pletely lifeless.
We have slipped withinwards
.
the sciousness has slipped withinwards
.
the body has remained just like a shell
.
if it falls it falls.
The body has relaxed
.
the body has relaxed
.
the body has pletely relaxed.
The breathing is calming down
.
the breathing is calming down.
Leave the breathing also relaxed.
The breathing is going on calming down
.
the breathing is calming down.
Retreat back even from the breathing, call your energy back from there too.
The breathing is going on calming down
.
the breathing is calming down
.
the breathing is calming down
.
the breathing is calming sown
.
the breathing is calming down, is calming down.
Leave it relaxed
.
leave the breathing relaxed
.
the breathing is going on calming down
.
the breathing is going on calming down
.
the breathing has relaxed.
Leave the thoughts also
.
move back from them too
.
move further back from them.
The thoughts are relaxing
.
the thoughts are relaxing.
Go on feeling
.
the thoughts are relaxing
.
the thoughts are relaxing
.
the thoughts are going on relaxing.
The thoughgts are also dropping
.
you have moved further back
.
you have moved further back.
The thoughts are going on calming down
.
the thoughts are going on calming down
.
the thoughts are going on calming down
.
the thoughts have calmed down.
Now, for ten minutes just remain awake within, remain scious within.
Look within wakefully.
Oside, death has happened.
The body is lying down, almost dead, away
.
we have retreated back
.
the sciousness has remained lit like a flame.
You are only knowing
.
only seeing.
Remain just a watcher
.
settle in the seeing.
For ten minutes only go on looking within, do not do anything else, only go on looking.
Inside
.
more inside
.
go on looking inside
.
slowly, slowly you would have slipped into depths
.
as if one goes on falling in a deep well
.
goes on falling
.
goes on falling.
Look
.
for ten minutes just remain looking.
(A deep silence prevails
.
after few minutes, Osho starts giving suggestions again.
)
Drop yrip pletely
.
and go deeper within
.
go deeper within.
Only go on looking wakefully
.
slowly, slowly
.
slowly, slowly, everything will turn into a void.
Only a flame of knowing will go on burning in the void, that "I am knowing"
.
am knowing
.
am seeing
.
am seeing.
Drop it pletely, drop all your trol
.
drown in the depths and go on looking
.
the mind will go on quietening.
Mind is beiy
.
mind is beiy
.
let go totally
.
disappear
.
just die.
Disappear pletely from outside
.
let go pletely from outside
.
as if a wave may disappear and bee the o.
Let go pletely
.
do not keep even the least grip.
Mind is beiy
.
mind is beiy
.
mind is beiy.
Mind has bee pletely empty
.
mind has bee empty
.
mind has bee empty.
Only a flame has remained burning
.
a flame of knowing
.
of seeing.
For all the rest, as if death has happened
.
the body will be seen lying at a distance
.
your own body will be seen so far away
.
your owhing will seem to be so far away.
Inside
.
more inside
.
drown
.
let go pletely
.
do not keep any grip
.
let go
.
let go
.
let go pletely.
Let go totally.
If the body wants to drop, let it drop
.
let go pletely
.
bee a void
.
bee a void pletely.
Mind has bee a void
.
mind has bee a void
.
only a flame of knowing has remained inside
.
everthing elso has bee a void
.
eveything has disappeared.
Let go
.
let go pletely
.
show the ce to die
.
die pletely from outside.
The body has bee lifeless
.
we have slipped pletely inside
.
we have slipped pletely inside
.
only a flame he heart has remained burning.
We are seeing
.
we are knowing
And everything has disappeared
.
we have remained only a watcher.
The mind has bee pletely a void.
Look ily into this void
.
inside, look at this void.
A great spectrum of bliss will unfold within that very void
.
a great light of bliss will fill that very void.
A waterfall may emerge and only bliss flows all around, which spreads all over you, in your every fiber, in your each particle.
Look ily in that void
.
and just as a flower blossoms when the sun rises, similarily the spring of bliss bursts forth looking at the void within.
Only the bliss prevails all over, all around.
Look
.
look within
.
let that spring burst forth
.
look within
.
as if a fountain of bliss opens up and bliss abounds all over.
Now, slowly take a few deep breaths.
The breath will appear to be far away.
Slowly take a deep breath
.
keep watg the breath.
The mind will bee even calmer.
Slowly take a few deep breaths
.
slowly take a few deep breaths
.
slowly take a few deep breaths.
The mind will bee even calmer
.
the mind will bee even calmer.
Thehe eyes slowly
.
open the eyes slowly
.
e back from meditation.
Those who are lying down or have fallen down, take a deep breath slowly
.
then open your eyes
.
a up very slowly aly.
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